my chinese new years...

Chinese New Year cheers are spreading around like a contagious disease, infecting anyone who are so pumped up for the 2 days break. i should be part of them, the infected ones, but unfortunately my immune system has been fortified with the fact that i'll be working when everyone else are enjoying their time out there....damn it..then again, i haven't been celebrating it for the past three years...ever since i worked in the hospitality industry..

there was a time when the lunar new year was the only celebration i look forward to. the thought of getting ang pows, playing fireworks and getting more ang pows (okay okay..and meeting up with my cousins hehe) is gratifying enough for a someone like me. yeah, i remember those days...days when i was still a kid and days before the passing of my grandfather...

i'm part chinese from my dad's side, my grandfather was a pure bred china man. history be told that he was a stowaway on board of a chinese ship to escape capture by the communists for leading a youth rebel against them (or so i was told haha). eventually, his journey landed him in Ranau and that's where his new life began.

his marriage to my grandmother bore him 7 children. and life back then was tough with him doing odd jobs here and there, but eventually he pulled through to become one of the most successful entrepreneur in his day. but his success never got to his head, he was well respected and loved by the young and old in that small town and made a major impact in the town's development as well.

yeah, he was smart and wise..but also very stubborn, a trait which was passed down to his descendants (among other things) hahaha. but his success wouldn't have materialized without the support of his loving wife, my grandmother.

now, my grandmother is of small stature but with a big heart. in my entire life, i dont think i've ever heard her raised her voice..not even once. she was this patient and resourceful woman, and in more ways than one...a stark contrast to my grandfather. but despite their differences, no one could deny how much they loved and cared for each other. even in their old age, they were still sleeping with together on the same bed. my mom once told me that, my grandparents would talk about stuff until late before falling asleep, and they would repeat the same routine every night.

i like to think that my cousin and i were my grandfather's favorite, we seem to always get our ways with him, probably because we weren't afraid of him... we respected him, but definitely not afraid of him :).

i could still remember one particular chinese new year when my grandfather scolded me in front of everyone else. now, every first day of chinese new year, my cousin and i would come up to him and ask him for extra money to buy fireworks (that was before fireworks were banned) and he would normally give us RM50 or 100, depending on how much he felt like giving (he would normally give us RM100 though hehe) and back then, even RM50 was like jackpot to us haha.

put it this way, my cousin spent all his money on fireworks while i only spent a third of the money (cos i wanted to keep the rest for other stuff haha). we dont normally show the fireworks we bought to our grandfather but on that particular day, we did. here i was with only a bag of fireworks which didn't even fill half of it while cousin had three bags full of it. looking at the difference, my grandfather enquired why i didn't have as many fireworks as my cousin and i explained to him that i'd like to keep the rest of the money for something else.

the next thing i knew he was scolding me saying something like 'i gave you the money to buy fireworks and i expect you to spend the money on what you asked for!!' i think that was the first time he ever raised his voice at me and i left him crying..in contempt and confused. i went back to the store and finished all the money on fireworks hahaha.

for a very long time, i couldn't understand why i was scolded for being reserved. my parents taught me to save money and i was scolded for not spending it...but after several years i realized the lesson behind it. when you're given something to work at, you should do it whole heartedly and ignore other distractions. but hey, that's only my interpretation :).

as i was saying earlier, chinese new year hasn't been the same after my grandfather's passing. he was the glue to the tradition, he was the light of the event and he was the man of the show. nowadays, it's more of a somber celebration...having to do it just because we have to and not because of we want to.

hmmm...come to think of it, i do miss my grandfather...a lot...

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR PEOPLE...may you have a prosperous year ahead :).

cheers :)