Wednesday, February 18, 2009

regrets...?

'i like you...alot...', my first confession to her (and my first at making the first move with anyone :p) during dinner on an informal date from a wedding reception, not to mention intoxicated for the added boldness, 'but i don't think we should be together, it's not you...it's me...' quoting one of those corny lines to express my sincere opinion on what's in store for us.

'i'll be the judge of that, but what exactly do you mean?'..

'i dunno...i just see you with someone more deserving...'

'like i said, i'll be the judge of that...'

deep down, as much as i liked her, i really didn't want to cross the boundary of being just friends...but i think the main reason i really didn't want to go through with it was because, it wasn't love i was feeling. i knew i 'like' her and love has nothing to do with it.

we gave the relationship a shot and it progressed quite well. i basically knew her family and she got to meet up with mine, and coincidently, we shared the same mutual friends.

things were looking up, she was the female version of me...sarcastic, smart, witty..did i say smart? in a way, we were ready to settle down..we kinda talked about it but the thought of settling down with someone for the sake of..marriage and not love just doesn't sound right to me. it didn't take long until love presented itself, my so called first love..or so i thought. so we broke up (kinda), and pursued my new love interest only to be crushed in the end :). i'm just not the type to two timing anyone for the sake of my own pleasures :P.

anyhow, it was about a year after the break up did i get to meet up with her and she was with her fiance and husband to be. she didn't think highly of me when we met up, well, it's only fair after what i did and i didn't blame her the least.

looking back, i am glad that we broke up. she's finally settling down with the kind of guy whom i've always thought of she would be with :).

i know i should be happy with the coming wedding, and frankly i am. it's just that, i realized...i have been missing her :).

ps: dont worry, am not gonna crash her wedding in any way haha

15 comments:

JerryInc said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
JerryInc said...

i will forever hold my peace dude...besides, we're back to being good friend now..am even helping out on her wedding reception as my penance hahaha :).

but you know what..karma sucks hahaha

Qhris said...

wahh....bagus ni hehe mau kawin sdh :P

JerryInc said...

tunggu masa laini hehe

Claire said...

hehehe...like Dan said...go crash the wedding...hahaha

SiGracy said...

hah!! sia tau ni sepa...sia nampak prewedding shoot dia...hrmmm..all i can say is FIRST IS NOT THE LAST...WOOHOOO~~~

JerryInc said...

deiiii claire.. it's over and done with suda lah :)

Gems...diam2 jak ko :)

Wel^Beiolman said...

huhu..u need dewar's lgi ni..hehe..

be a gentleman ba jerry...spend some time with her and say what you wanted to say all this time...haha..let it out..haha...

atleast u're doing what you should have done earlier..

JerryInc said...

ya bah...next time ko balik kita gasak lagi tu Dewar's hahaha.

nda payah lah...someone once told me that 'if there's nothing left to say, don't say anything'...:P

yeah, guess i'm doing the right thing then :).

Fridaycat said...

"I just see you with someone more deserving."

I dunno why but I just have an issue with statements like these...

But, you know how that cliche goes: Everything happens for a reason.

And with that...bah mari pi minum!

JerryInc said...

hahahaha, buli bah kalu ko Mel hahaha. this saturday, the pub near your place :)

Qhris said...

ikut hahaa..nda bah, nway c wel pnya advise tu kan....ntah dia brani ka juga tidak kalu dia, hehe tau2lah shy person kunun dia tu (mangkali lah..wakaka) :P

JerryInc said...

hahahaha...ikut kunun hahaha. huh, si wel tu tembirang jak tu. mula2 jak pemalu, gitulah dia trap dia punya girlfriends semua tu hahahaha

Wel^Beiolman said...

Kindets..trap ka jerry..hahaha...mana sia trap..bersara suda ba ni..tua suda..teda lg main trap mentrap ni..haha.....kalu mimang pemalu pun kana kasi salah..haha...

easy saying then doing ba ni kenen..haha..asal dia gembira sja ba kan jerry..hahaha..

JerryInc said...

owh yess hahaha