my last entry...for the week??

i'll be leaving to Manila today for my long awaited holiday. just as the island trip i went to recently, my excitement level for this trip is more or less the same..which is zero to nothing hahaha. frankly, the only reason i joined for this trip is for the sights and sounds, the culture and the environment but the rest of the group only has one thing in their mind...clubbing..geez..i think i'm getting a bit too old for the clubbing scene hahaha. the fact that i wont be joining them in their clubbing frenzy made me think of other plans so after asking around, i've finally decided to spend most of time in the cinema catching up with the movies i wasn't able to see..preferably alone :). yeah, come to think of it..i might be able to maximize my holiday experience by doing stuff alone as it would enable me to do stuff at my own time and pace.

anyway, didn't really sleep well last night...my mind was too busy thinking about random and irrelevant stuff, and in the end..my mind drifted to death hahaha. the questions of what ifs suddenly popped into mind and i wasnt able to shake the thought of it hehe.

well, death itself didn't scare me the least..but the thought of not being able to do the things that you were supposed or wanted to do bugged me a lot. i thought of if the plane suddenly crashed or if i became a victim of terrorism in a foreign country..what would i have regretted the most..hmmm, only 1 answer came up. my only regret would be..not having told the person i ever cared about how much i love that person (yeah...going into sappy mode now hahaha) and i would regret not seeing or spend time with that person before my sudden death hahaha (okay, sappy mode off) hehe. man...i really need to give my mind a break hahaha.

guess wat..am still not packed yet..i dont wanna go but i know i should. maybe a long holiday is exactly what i needed after everything that has happened. life still sucks, but i'm gonna do the best i can to make living worthwhile.

ciao peeps...