Thursday, July 29, 2010

a fraction of truth

i don't know how i got there, all i can remember were sparkling stars decorating the night sky, few toys strewn on the pavement and me standing on the sidewalk looking at the 2nd floor balcony without much of an expectation.

an alternate observation between the hovering diamonds and the balcony while trying to digest the unfamiliar things around me, a figure exited from the sliding door, walked and stopped at the balcony railing and started looking around as if having lost something.

i hid in the shadows, not quite sure why, but i did anyway. after a while of looking somewhat lost, the figure turned to my direction as if knowing i was there even though cloaked in darkness and made the way down to me. i wanted to run, but i felt stuck..my legs were no longer part of me but an entity with its own mind disobeying the directive passed on through the biological synapses from the brain to the motor sensors.

inch by inch the figure moved towards me until we were confronted with each other. i knew the face, heck, i knew the figure from even when we were facing each other. there were stuff i wanted to say but only one word came to mind, and with regret i said, 'sorry'.

she smiled and started picking up the toys. the next thing i remember was, it was day time and she was standing beside her husband with a baby in his arm. they looked happy, i felt happy because at that moment i remembered what i had told her when i had the guts to confess my feelings,

'i'm not sure if things between us are going to work, but i feel you deserve to be with someone better, and i'm not sure if i'm that person', (okay, just an approximate of what i had meant) and she replied, 'that's for me to decide'.

strange thing about instincts is that, they are most of the time accurate regardless of how unlikely the situation may be.

i stood there for a while, smiled at them and walked away feeling contented because, i was right after all.

few hours after waking up from the dream, i logged into my facebook account and true enough, a greeting was waiting for me by her. i tinge of regret of the what might have been was temporarily experienced, but regret has no place in the present or future because everyone has moved on..as it is supposed to be.

6 comments:

Claire said...

hmmm...it sounds personal so i'm not going to comment so much but just want to say that...siuk pula baca ni kan...haha it feels like there's something more underneath so terhibur jg saya bermain teka meneka la...muahaha

JerryInc said...

haha, kira straight forward gia ni hahaha

Claire said...

ya kah? straight sda ka ni gni? hahaha just say saya yg telampau out of the box la bilang ba k...jgn kasi malu ah..hahahhaa

JerryInc said...

hahaha claire, straight suda ni...btw, sa kerja di KL suda bulan depan (september) jd pandai2lah cr sa kio hehehe

Claire said...

okies! kau pun pandai2 la ba cari saya d penang..hihihi end of august sy pun pindah keja sda juga..so all the best to u and to me!:D

JerryInc said...

wuii..mana ko pindah? :)