Tuesday, August 5, 2008

flirts and boundaries...rebounds and mistakes...

one thing sucks about breaking up is seeing your ex with another person or flirting with one. well, it only hurts when your feelings are still as strong as before...

okay, now let's talk about flirting. everybody flirts, even when you're currently attached with someone and basically, flirting is quite harmless...as long as it is within boundaries. personally, there are only two reasons as to why people flirt...to be at ease with that person without any ulterior motives or to gain something in return, either a relationship or just plain sex with no strings attached.

for the lonely bastards (including myself), flirting is a process of getting into a relationship..the first step of getting to know the person we're interested with. but for most of those people out there who already has someone with them, flirting is all about getting their rocks off! damn f***ers :).

there are ways to detect if your current partner is flirting with someone else, and it varies according to how well you know them. sometimes it could be the look in their eyes, their gestures, speech and mostly...their actions. there's no point to further elaborate on this, anyone can sense it themselves and the hunches are always on the dot.

but does flirting constitute to cheating? not exactly..as long as no physical contacts (sex or tongue wriggling hehe) are involved, the cheating element does not exist. so okay, is it still advisable to flirt around when these contacts doesn't apply? my opinion, no. personally i think when someone even considers of flirting around, the chances of cheating or being cheated is there, and that's one thing i dont understand..how can a person even think of flirting around or scouting for a ONS (one night stands) when they're currently attached.

when i was in my recent relationship (which totally failed), i couldn't think of anyone else to be (or do it) with but that one person only, never once did i cross the boundary..hey, come to think of it, i didn't even flirt with anyone at all... see, i am strange, i dont think i can get it up with anyone random hahahaha. was going to talk about open relationships, but it is obvious what my stand would be right? :). my motto was, don't do what you dont want your partner to do, in that way..you have every reason to be mad when he/she does what you didn't do :).

we get to be very vulnerable after every break up, and some people would even try to take advantage of your situation. but they can't be blamed, to them..this may be the only time they can show their sincerity to form a relationship with you, which is always touching. and sometimes, we fell for it probably because of being blinded by the need to love and be loved in return. but as your heart heals, you realised a mistake has been made...yeah, you may have feelings towards your current spouse, but you also know that there's someone out there whom you're totally in love with, but there's nothing you can do..well there is, you just don't know how to go about it..you're just so indebted with what the person has done you would rather settle for what is (right now) than what could've been, and you bet on your chance thinking that what you feel for that one special person will pass like your other flings..but what if it doesn't. would you regret not acting on what should've been? (like i'm the one to talk hahaha) :).

anyhow, had my own share of experience in this (strangely enough, i got calls, text messages and approaches as if knowing i just broke up haha) ...i never felt so hurt before and all i needed was to have someone to be with me irregardless of who they are or what they look like (yeah, i was dead desperate hehehe). i knew where my desperation was leading to, and if it wasn't for that advice from my so called big bro, i would be in a rebound-relationship by now. good thing i wasn't, cos i know i would totally regret it :).

dont worry peeps, am not pissed off or melancholic, just needed to get some stuff off my chest...one piece of advice though..always trust your instincts when something doesn't smell right :).

ps: man..i dont like what i'm seeing, you're doing it again hahahaha. oohh, my right knee is bruised..have no idea how it happened. damn it :)...stop it boy, you're rambling again..dont be a gidiot for everybody's sake (err..ok kah tu Yo/Mel, gitu kah mau eja gidiot tu? hehehe)

ciao peeps :P...


Yo. said...

yep, g for gidiot.


JerryInc said...

hahaha..that was the day...(mcm tua suda bah kan haha)

Fridaycat said...

Three gidiots in the gelevator going to level gero.

There is hope for us yet.

JerryInc said...

hahaha, you and your G's lah tu Mel...hahaha