if i could...would i?

having blessed with free will, freedom and a mind of our own, it's not surprising that we tend to come up with crazy (or probably radical) ideas of how we want to experience or experiment things first hand just to fulfill our curiosities. heck, this was how inventions and innovations came to be.

but sometimes, these curiosities can take a turn for the worse when the thoughts get a little bit on the dark side. because of this, i sometimes scare myself with the things that i conjure up in my head.

this may sound wrong in many levels, but there have been times when i had thought of seeing someone bleed to death from a single open wound such as a cut to the wrist or to any one major veins. gory accidents doesn't count as there would be blood all around, leaving them unsightly messy and probably unconscious.

some other times, i would imagine what it would be like to give the abusers, torturers and killers of humans and animals (out of greed or fun) a taste of their own medicine. would they appreciate what is being done unto them?

after having these scary thoughts, i asked myself if i have the guts to actually inflict pain on others and my sadistic side gladly responded 'yes'...but do i have the heart to commit murder? my conscience was torn at this question but as much i would like to see these people suffer, i could not take another person's life (and hopefully i would never face a situation where i have to) . i can just imagine the burden and guilt of having blood on my hands. correct me if i'm wrong but once you've taken a person's life, it will haunt you for the rest of your life.

sadistically funny isn't it? hahaha :D

next post: psychopath vs sociopath...

tempoRary insaNity...

everyone goes through that phase where things seem to be meaningless and whatever you're doing or have been doing all these while doesn't amount to be anything much. and when you start questioning your own existence, that's where things can turn for the worse...it's like pouring gasoline to a raging fire.

in situations like this, it helps to have like minded friends who are open as a book or a little bit crazy in doing things that you're into...say for example, a midnight dip by the beach after a drink under the drizzling rain with flashes of lightning and roaring thunder...yes, there's a danger in doing that, but life is full of risks and and it has been proven over and over again that despite the safety precautions that we take, we are never free from the dangers lurking around the corner. so if it's our time, there's nothing much we can do to change that.

after hanging out with my pal last night, it dawned on me how much i missed this type of company. open, unreserved and no or very little pretenses. i like the fact that these people who choose to hang out with me are not doing their best to change the situation but in fact go with the flow and see where the situation leads us and i love it when i can just say out my mind without having to worry about what other people might think. i like and miss the openness these people have.

coming back to the topic, everyone has that insanity streak within them and most are very good at covering it up. but why cover the insanity if it defines the person you really are? it's like telling van gogh to paint as to what his eyes see but not at what his heart feel. if your sanity makes you a better person, it's best to not hide it.

it took me quite awhile to get to terms with my own streaks. i thought that moving to a new environment i could at least be a different person, blend in with the crowd and be just like everyone else who are, to say the least, normal in everyday sense.

but my recent crisis communications workshop proved me otherwise when i failed in my situational interview. instead of just being who i am, i decided to try and act like i was one of those people in the room who were fluent with their responses. bad move, i was more afraid of being wrong by imitating others rather than being right for being me. besides, i was never an actor in the first place.

so who am i really? the answer is: i am an observer of actions and situations, i am best when i'm alone and better when surrounded by few trusted friends, i am an angry person who contradicts himself by smiling and laughing as a way to suppress the rage, i am strange in more ways than one, and a lost and confused lad in this new world of modern age. in other words, i am just like everyone out there who are still trying to find themselves...a unique individual and a normal human among the weird ones :Dyeah, i may be crazy...but i'm not stupid. stay tuned, things might get a little bit darker from here onwards hahaha.

ciao peeps :p

we are a primitive race...

One has to wonder what are our purposes in life. aside from the usual stuff that we do such as eating, drinking, shitting (hahaha), work, sleep, etc etc... we must have a significant role to play that only ourselves are capable of doing, i mean why else are we created differently from each other?

On my end, i want to do a lot of stuff. unfortunately, the things that i want to do aren't in my capabilities. for example, i'd (very much) like to pass judgment (most likely the death sentence) to whomever kills other people and animals senselessly (and this includes the leaders who wages war against their fellow humans).

I just wish that the day would come when all humans regardless of their race and skin color work together without taking their beliefs or religions as an excuse to refrain from being together as one and i wish that people will someday have the commonality to agree on things for the better sake of a bright future.

Sadly, being (a primitive) human denies us that privilege. which makes me wonder the societal structure for aliens (assuming that they exist) from other planets.

given their highly evolved brain, would they still squabble among themselves in petty stuff to the point of declaring war against each other in their home-world? or do they focus on advancing their civilization to a higher level?

I remember a watching an episode from the sci-fi series 'SG-1' a decade ago which shows a peaceful civilization that banned all form of violence and warfare as it nearly destroyed their world a long time ago. so instead, they focused on advancing their technology to improve their living condition and to protect their home-world from potential threats by other planetary beings. the point that i'm trying to say is that, why can't we as humans work together for our own benefit? why must there be wars in the name of religion, ego or greed? why can't we advance our mentality for the good of mankind?

i'd like to say that my trust and hope on people and humanity is fading, and i'd like to say that i am ashamed of being one of them. but i can't, because as much as i'd like to think otherwise, the fact remains that i am still human and the best i can do now is hope that we humans would someday come to our senses...hopefully sooner.

peace out and cheers...

blogger via android SGS2

the lost boy...

i feel at loss, not really sure of what. all i can think of is just to crawl into a dark corner and hibernate until it's time for me reappear.

what brought on this nonsense? i have no idea...probably it has something to do with being surrounded by people a lot. this may sound strange coming from someone who is in the public relations field, which suggests strongly that i may be in the wrong profession.

then again, i was never much of a social person. my idea of socializing is being around a small group of 3-5 people. despite being such an anti-social, i have no problem with mingling or interacting with other fellow homo-sapiens but that's only because i have to and not because i want to.

maybe i can crawl into that dark corner and come out only for people i'm comfortable with, and for starters...i'll be catching a movie this Friday with a good pal of mine.

until i'm ready, i'll refrain from logging into my facebook, twitter and group whatsapp. unless it's urgent, i'll refrain from making or replying calls and smses.

describing what exactly i'm feeling right now, it's like there's something missing. just imagine a completed jigsaw puzzle and one piece keeps falling off, overtime you get tired of putting it up every single time and in the end you figured the piece would be much better off left unattended.

or imagine the light and the dark (yeah it's cliche, i know haha). the infighting of trying to reign dominion over an element has gotten to the point where neither elements matter and hazy grey is as good as either one.

ps: before anyone jumps to conclusion, it has nothing to do with relationship issues haha

one obvious sign that shows how lost i am is...i keep asking myself 'who am i' and 'what am i supposed to do'...

losing sight of myself and just need sometime alone...cheers :D

the agenda?...

I don't have much of an opinion when it comes to politics, but one thing i do know is that politic involves both the politicians and voters...forming somewhat like a symbiotic dependency. as far as observation goes, the politicians tend to get things done when election is just around the corner. this is when they play the 'people's plights' card and also the time for the people to get what they want.

politics is a complicated affair and can be dirty at times. having known for being smooth operators or sweet talkers, most politicians would come up with agendas or promises just to get votes without being 100% certain, manipulating the voters confidence into rooting for them.

but the manipulators can be manipulated, because as you know...the people isn't dumb as what most politicians would like to think because to get on our good side, they would need to fight for our cause.



Referring to the embed video, Nurul Izzah, the opposition party politician who holds a seat in the Lembah Pantai parliament, were thrown negative comments for her involvement in the recent animal abuse case with comments saying she's only involved to gain public confidence.

but you know what.... being an animal lover and concerned over the welfare of the alleged 100 missing cats, it is a good thing that a leader is willing to step up and fight for the cause.

after the petknode boarding house incident which made headlines for the past couple of days, none of the leaders made their appearance to fight for the people's plight. so in terms of PR image, Ms. Nurul Izzah are points ahead.

what we as the public or animal lovers want is to have the case settled fairly and have the petknode owners punished accordingly. if Ms. Nurul's main objective is to gain the public's confidence, i'll have to say that she is on the right track and if she is using this issue as a stepping stone, then it's only fair to say that two can play that game...for all we know, she is just a tool to get this issue settled, but if she's doing this from the goodness of her heart, then bless her soul.

however it is, it all comes down to the people themselves. politics is a two way street with chances of the manipulators being manipulated.

Ciao peeps :D

finally, the change....

Finally...the change that we've been waiting for, thus my soul is spared haha

read it all HERE

but don't get all excited just yet, this will only be tabled in the parliament next year and if you noticed, it said a fine of 'up to' RM100,000...meaning the minimum would still be RM200, which is still very low and affordable to nearly everyone. instead, they should set it at RM10,000 minimum as a deterrent...

ps: damn, blogging via android on web platform is tough... especially when trying to insert a link haha. tough but do-able haha

Cheers

animal cruelty..again...

'i would sell my soul to the devil if it means obtaining powers to punish those who:

a) tortures, abuses and kills animals without mercy
b) tortures, abuses and kills other humans without justification or mercy

and yes, i am serious....

my priority would be on (a) simply because we have laws on (b) to protect human beings.

i miss the days when i am ignorant and sheltered by the harsh realities of life and i miss seeing the innocence in every humans that i encounter. but that's just part of living and growing up, we have to accept that things change, most of the time, and not the way we want them to be.

while some changes can be good, others can be detrimental to an individual and societal structure and ignoring the things which needs changing can give off the same effect as well. take murder for example, should there be no stringent laws as a remedy to future occurrences, killings would be prevalent and all humans would distrust each other...well okay, trusting people nowadays isn't the same as how it was decades ago, but can you imagine if there are no laws to curb the atrocious act?

as humans, we are protected by laws which dictates our safety and security, but shouldn't we extend the same protection to the other weaker beings...like animals?

in this year alone, there have been reports of animal cruelties and some of the highlighted ones are:

a) The abused Sushi the poodle
--->> watch video HERE
--->> and news report HERE
--->> for the facebook page alleging the culprits, click HERE (I mean, the resemblance and identifiable mark is there, how difficult is it to nail or investigate Allan Tan and Doreen Loo as the alleged perpetrators??)
--->> interesting feed HERE
the charge: NONE as far as i know, couldn't find any articles on their charges.

b) the Serdang Cat Killer (stupid bitch Chow Siow Wei)
--->> watch the CCTV recording HERE [Note: not for the faint of heart]
the charge: a maximum fine of RM400

c) Misc
-->> click HERE

d) and the latest one is at PetKnode Boarding house in Damansara (Greedy bastards Shahrul Azuwan Adanan and Yushairi Khairuddin)
-->> click HERE for more info
the charge: walked scot free with only a fine of RM400

this recent incident shouldn't be taken lightly. 300 cats and a dog were left to starve for a week (or more) resulting in the deaths of 9 cats. this is a clear case of negligence and the perpetrators should be imposed a higher penalty for being irresponsible.

for your information, we do have an Animal Ordinance which includes the penalty for cruelty against animals. but as written in part 4, section 44 of the Animal Ordinance 1953, the penalty for such cruelty is....

...'a fine of two hundred dollars or to imprisonment for a term of six months or to both.'

way to go Malaysia for having such 'heavy' and 'frightening' penalty! (come on lah!!! anyone can afford RM200 lah bastards!!)

for most pet owners, their pet isn't only just another animal, it's part of their family... so you would understand why people would get distressed knowing that their pets have been ill treated. but regardless of whether they are someone else's pet or strays, no animals should be treated harshly or even killed without any good reason, they're after all living beings and God's creations.

or maybe the meaning of compassion and empathy no longer exist in our vocabulary....

a cat and her kitten dead from starvation in the recent animal cruelty incident at Petnode Boarding in Damansara...

yes, i would sell my soul to the devil if it means i can make a change by passing my own judgment on them. if it were up to me, my choice of punishment would be subjecting them to a taste of their own medicine...

cheers...