tipsy..in the office? hehehe

took a break from work and decided to head over to the lobby lounge for a few drinks...and after gulping down a glass of stout and 4 shots of Chivas on the rocks, am now a bit tipsy. couldn't afford to be drunk as i have some other tasks to complete before heading for home, and that's where i am now, in the office..tipsy and blogging before continuing with my work hahaha... (thats one of the advantages working in the hotel line hehe).

anyhow, i should be off my work by now and enjoying the night out...well, i could, i had all the time to complete my tasks earlier today but i just wasnt in the mood :). just thinking about having fun tonight didn't appeal to me as i will be spending some quality time tomorrow either with my friends or alone (depending on my mood, (though most probably i will be having fun alone at my usual waterhole hehehe (not exactly a problem, i'm good at self entertainment :P).

fyi, i've been going around faking a smile on my face showing everybody that everything is fine and i couldn't be bothered with anything. but the plain fact is, i'm just too confused with everything i dont even know how to react hehe. then again, i'm just not the type to share with anyone my problems..lets just say i'm a Leo, and i have a pride of a King. sharing my problems would be like showing your weaknesses to your subjects...and thats one thing i can't afford to do, to be weak :). besides, i've always kept things to myself..so basically i'm used to it, although sometimes i wish that i had someone to share it with (a wish which is becoming more unrealistic each day hehe).

anyhow, i shouldnt be complaining..things happen for a reason. maybe it's a lesson for me to learn and to avoid from making the same mistake again. okay, lesson learned...:)

i want or i need?

yeah, just as what the title says. do i go for what i want or do i go for what i need? these are the two things which has been bugging me since this morning and i still haven't made up my mind yet... i should know by now that what i want isn't necesserily what i need..but that was before i understood that sometimes what we want is exactly what we need. the transition from wanting that certain something can sometimes be so overwhelming it transforms the want to become need.

lemme put it into something simpler. say, you've found a better paying job offer advertised somewhere, but at the moment you're quite comfortable with where you are now. all you can do is feel like you want that job . and after sometime thinking about it nearly every minute of everyday, you somehow know that you need the job for a better future.

sometimes the line between wanting something and needing something is so fine making the differentiation difficult. it's easy to know that we want it, but how do we know that we need it? hmm...basically want is something we would like to have, but even if we dont get it, it won't affect our lives. need is something more intrinsic, basically it's defined as something we have to have and without it, a neccessity..we can either die or life definitely wouldn't be the same.

which got me thinking, which category does our existence fall in to? do we want to be alive or is it a neccessity to be one?

well...first of all, we didn't have a choice when we were born into this world (maybe we do, but that would require explanations of cosmic proportions hehe), basically we were born (alive) whether we want to or not. and being alive constitutes to doing whatever is needed to keep the body (or soul :P) alive. but if we were to be born, only to die in the end..what's the point of being alive in the first place? what's worse is that, after living and experiencing all the fun and exciting stuff life has to offer, letting go becomes difficult..almost unbearable.

okay, maybe some would think that once we are born..life itself is in our hands and we can do whatever we want with it, whether to keep it or waste it and cease to exist. everyone says that life is too precious to be wasted, but then again people says stuff they dont really understand or mean. other things were precious to them before, but yet, they dont show any appreciation for it and ignore them completely or, once they found a new replacement or their so called conscience kicks in. anyhow, everyone's only human and that's their trump card for every single mistake committed :).

now..do i go for what i want or what i need? ..

do i want to be happy? - yes

do i need to be happy? - no

do i want to forgive? - no

do i need to fogive? - yes

do i want to be forgiven? - yes

do i need to be forgiven? - yes

do i want to be with someone? -yes

do i need to be with someone? - no

do i want to be alone tomorrow? - yes

do i need to be alone tomorrow? - no

now, do you see the contradictory pattern here. what we want isn't always what we need, but sometimes the want and need aligns when the demand for it is overwhelming :). simply saying, our wants can be our needs but our needs can never be our wants :).

man..what crap. should've been concentrating more on my tasks than wasting my time on entries like this hehehe..

ciao peeps :)

ps: gonna take 2 days off tomorrow onwards, need a break :)

IT networking with Cisco Learning Network :)

20 years ago, the technology boom was imminent. 10 years ago, i foresaw the huge potential in the IT field and few minutes ago, i regret not fighting for the opportunities that was presented to me for a career in IT related field. Yeah, you heard me right...got few offers to pursue my studies in the IT field, but my dad didn't see what i saw and he talked me out of it..

I've always known i had a knack for anything related to computers. this is just one of those stuff which i don't have to push my brain in figuring out how things works, all i need is someone to show me at least once or twice and i can do things on my own :).

Okay, i dare say that i don't have any experience when it comes to IT, but i do know a little bit about HTML and even had my shares of multimedia, these are the closest things i ever got to in the IT field hahaha.

Cisco certification? Well...as i was doing my usual net surfing, i stumbled upon this site, Cisco - The Learning Network. I realized that there are a lot of stuff to be learned when it comes to this field :). Okay, this is one place which offers certificates from entry to specialist programmes. the entry programme paves your way for a career in networking and the specialist makes you a specialist in several fields such as the sales specialist, solutions specialist, field specialist among others.

In my case i might have to start with the entry level program, which is the CCENT (Certified Entry Networking Technician). What is CCENT? hmm, CCENT is:

"The CCENT certification validates the skills required for entry-level network support positions, the starting point for many successful careers in networking. CCENT certified professionals have the knowledge and skill to install, operate, and troubleshoot a small enterprise branch network, including basic network security. CCENT certification is the first step toward achieving CCNA, which covers medium size enterprise branch networks with more complex connections."

At the end of this program, you would need to sit for ICND1 (Interconnecting Cisco Networking Devices 1) exam. Hey, it shouldn't be tough, would it? For this program, the duration is only:

5 days,Virtual Classroom hours, Web Based Training or
5 days,Classroom or
5 days,Remote Labs & Simulations

By the time you're done with the entry level program, you should be able to:

• Describe how networks function, identifying major components, function of network components and the Open System Interconnection (OSI) reference model.
• Using the host-to-host packet delivery process, describe issues related to increasing traffic on an Ethernet LAN and identify switched LAN technology solutions to Ethernet networking issues.
• Describe the reasons for extending the reach of a LAN and the methods that can be used with a focus on RF wireless access.
• Describe the reasons for connecting networks with routers and how routed networks transmit data through networks using TCP / IP.
• Describe the function of Wide Area Networks (WANs), the major devices of WANs, and configure PPP encapsulation, static and dynamic routing, PAT and RIP routing.
• Use the command-line interface to discover neighbors on the network and managing the routers startup and configuration .

Hey, i can tell you loads more on the programs on offer, but you know what.. it would be better if you could log into their website and check it out yourself. who knows, there might be a course there which suits you best :). Just in case some of you are just to slow to catch up and find the link somewhere in the paragraphs, here's another one for you to click on. CLICK HERE for website hahaha :).

morning peeps :)...

ps: somewhat interested :P..

Mika - Happy Ending

owh....yeah, before heading to bed i'd like to leave you with this song. this was my theme for today and probably the next few days to come :).. enjoy :)

Happy Ending - MIKA

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life
Can't get no love without sacrifice
If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well
A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' every day

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

2 o'clock in the morning, something's on my mind
Can't get no rest; keep walkin' around
If I pretend that nothin' ever went wrong, I can get to my sleep
I can think that we just carried on

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' every day

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

A Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love[repeat]

I feel as if I'm wasted
And I waste everyday

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
To live the rest of our life,
But not together.

ps: just feeling tired and melodramatic hehe. browse through the song in my playlist and tell me it isn't true :p...

ciao peeps..and final goodnight hehe

groggy ramblings

just got back from my best friend's wedding, and looking at her in the wedding dress reminded me how much we have changed through the years...and how old we really are :).

we've known each other for more than 20years, and in that period of time..i have been her shoulders where she can cry on, and her ears when she needs someone to listen. basically, she's one of the very extremely few people whom i can actually say..the person i know like the back of my hand.

sadly, i couldn't do the same to her cos i've convinced myself that my life is complicated enough to be shared with anyone else, and i've kept my thoughts and privacy all to myself without ever sharing it with anyone else...probably until now. but as of last year, i've begun to open up and even shared my personal thoughts and my inner self to the selected people, and i've since learned that it was a total mistake cos i now realize that there's no point in opening up to anyone else when they couldn't even understand or care to understand anything :). i mean, why would they wanna care when they have their own life to think about? :).

anyhow, still feeling somewhat groggy from the drinking session we had last night. coudn't really sleep even with the headache i was experiencing, so instead of lying in bed trying to force myself to sleep, i decided to turn things around and make use of the rest of the hours with something fun..yeah, a drinking session hehehe.

since there isn't much to be done after 11pm and the headache prevented me from driving to town for a fun night out, i decided to call up my cousin next door and organized our own drinking session :). it was only the two of us...but that's fine cos my cousin and i can talk about nearly everything and anything since we have the same interest in things. we can talk about science, astronomy, philosophy, work and lots more, but our all time favourite subject is...anything paranormal hahaha. by the time we're done, it was already 6am and a 24 cans of beer lay empty on the table :).

anyhow, i dont have any good reason for this latest entry...just felt like putting my thoughts into words :)...

goodnite peeps..need to get my beauty sleep, damn groggy...:)

ps: groggy cos after the drinking session, i had to wake up early to be at a relative's wedding with a terrible hangover..but i didn't drink during my best friend's wedding though (cos no alcohols were served!! darn it hehehe)

I LOVE MALAYSIA (Sabah to be precise :))

Okay, was dead bored at home after coming late from work (as usual). was thinking of watching some of my favorite animes but decided otherwise as my eyes were to tired to watch anything, so instead i decided to do some blog browsing and searched for paid opportunities which i can post in my blog.

Apparently, paid opportunities are quite hard to come by (there goes my chance of extra income hehe), so i did the next best thing...browse for free opportunities just to tire my mind off when i chanced upon this seemingly interesting opp (okay, i may have mentioned it's free, but not without any consolation. it's actually a competition for a chance to win (i think) a coffee table book on Malaysian experiences! woo hoo, this should be good..(sarcasm there...).

Okay, now here are the criterias for the competition (my responses in cerulean blue..i think :)):

1. Copy the 50+1 Malaysia book cover below & paste it in your post.
= now this shouldn't be too difficult, should it? so walla...an image for the book cover :)

2. Write what you love about Malaysia.
= hmm, i know this shouldn't be tough cos i'm a Malaysian and living in Malaysia..but after giving it much thought, i realized i dont really know much about our culture..man, this is sad. but here goes, i'll try my best to share what i know and learned as a Malaysian :).

I love Malaysia because: This is the only country I've ever lived in, the different cultures and myriad of races has given me a glimpse on the other countries I can only imagine being to, and the food are just great! I can have Chinese food without having to be in China, Indian food without having to be in India and obviously the spiced laden Malay food which gets your tounge burning for more.

And personally, being a Sabahan, there is no where else I would rather be. The ever smiling friendly and peaceful locales can brighten up your day with our seemingly weird accent and jovial appearances, and yes, we do have the most beautiful islands around!

With the myriad of cultures and races around, we Malaysians has the opportunities to celebrate different kind of celebrations and festivals regardless of our background. I celebrate Hari Raya although I'm not Muslim and others celebrate Chinese New Year even if they are not Chinese. The inter-cultural marriages have been one of the major contributing factors to this occurrence and one of the major cause in the seemingly harmonious relationships amongst the society.

But to be honest, although we seem like a perfect country to live in, we're not without any flaws. one thing for sure though, each and every one of us has that conscious realization to make this country one of the best by respecting and understanding each others' ideas, backgrounds, religions and practices. That's what makes us better than most :).

ps: i have no idea what 200-250 'page post' means. is it something like words and characters? hehe. well, thats 250 words from me then hahaha.

Well, if any of you people who wishes to take part in this so-called competition, do check out www.themalaysiapage.com for more details :).

hmm...ciao peeps, it's a Friday so go out there and have fun! who knows what'll happen tomorrow hehe...

ps2: man...i really do need to get a life...a fun one at it hahaha

ramblings again

that dreaded day is just around the corner (well..not exactly around, but getting there :)) and i've been squeezing my brains to figure out what should i do this year. as much as i try not to think about it, just looking at the dates everyday would remind me that it's getting closer and i still have no idea what to do..

for once, i thought i wouldn't be alone this year..probably i would have someone to share it with but alas...i am still as i was in the previous years, geez hehehe. there's no point in celebrating if you can't even share it with that one person who really matters most (basically that has been my motto for the past decade for not clebrating it...)

anyhow...i've applied for a couple of days leave on those dates and hopefully something would come up :).

hypocrisy...been thinking about that lately. does being ignorant constitute to being a hypocrite? i never would have thought to be one cos i am what you see, but only recently the task of being myself seems like a burden. i dont look at someone else's faults cos i know i'm not perfect..and i try to stay away from anything just because i dont wanna face the consecutive music. but even if i seem or was being hypocritical, just note that..i would never initiate anything that might jeopardize my standing.

pretending that everything is okay has started taking its toll, and i feel somewhat drained..tired if i may say so. tired of expecting things that wouldn't happen..tired of thinking that everything would one day be the same as it was before, tired of imagining the possibilities of what is and isnt..and tired of reflecting on the mistakes done.

maybe am not as wise as i think i am...cos if i was, i would be telling myself that what's past is past, what's left is the future. but i keep thinking that my future is shaped by my own past, every decision making points is always based on my past. suffice to say, my past still plays a significant role in my present which affects my future..confusing isnt it? hehe..

ciao peeps :)

ps: i think it's time for my break again...need a rest from my own mind or maybe everything...:)

Dream Blab...24.07

For the past three days, i've been having strange dreams which has left me feeling a bit lethargic waking up every morning. the dream's not exactly unusual as i used to have this kinda dream all the time but it somehow stopped for nearly a year...until now.

what's strange is that, i never had a similar dream 3 days in a row (okay..used to have a continuous same dream but only for two days max). what i meant by similar is, same concept but different settings. i dreamt i was flying and the feeling it left me was good enough to be real, the best part is...i knew i was dreaming while doing it (lucid dreaming?). couldn't remember well the first two dreams but i clearly remember my dream last night.

i had the ability of flight, not in a corporeal sense..ethereal probably. i was alone, yet i was happy. i was flying around going through trees, buildings, bodies and other material objects without any worries and i can see the people around me without them seeing me. but the people didn't interest me, i was more interested in flying around and seeing everything pass by me in super speed...yeah, i was in my world.

all was good, i decided to fly higher up in the clouds when suddenly a hooded man of 7 or 8 feet tall appeared right after passing through the second layer of night cloud. i wasn't surprised, but i felt a bit weird seeing him as he looked like he was vertically stretched :p. the moment he appeared, the plane..the surrounding suddenly changed. i was no more surrounded by people, instead i was in a cloud covered crimson evening colored surrounding with only few trees and a building which looked like an abandoned institution. i figured i must be in another dream...

this man...aside from his unusual unproportionate height, i couldn't recall seeing him with a face. but i know he has a face, only that when i try to think of it...his face becomes a blur, like faces morphing continuously at high speed. anyhow, it doesnt matter. what matters is, i was taught a new technique of flying which is, a clear view of everything around while flying at high speed...and yeah, i was taught how to maximise my speed as well :).

i played around with my new found lesson, we even played tag (man, this guy was super fast even when he's not trying!!) when out of the blue, another person appeared out of nowhere. he seemed local enough (no pun intended), dark skinned, a bit short and looked really dumb haha. we stopped and the man went to the new guy. i was told that the new guy couldn't fly, and after seeing him fail everytime trying to get off the ground, i flew higher and smiled to myself while looking down at him (yeah..maybe i am evil hehe).

i suddenly thought of flying higher, i wanna see what's beyond the cloud and i can see the worried look on the man's face. he wanted me stop but i didnt see the harm of it, i wasn't Icarus and there wasnt any Sun around..even if there were, i wasnt wearing any wings made of wax and feather, so i continued higher when i saw the man hovered directly above me and told me not to proceed any further, but by then..i suddenly felt tired, and got back on the ground for a short break. and the moment i touched the ground...my alarm clock rang!! damn it, wtf??!! i woke up feeling quite lethargic, it felt like i've only slept for less than the actual 6 hours (felt like i didn't sleep at all...) i had a good dream..and frankly i didnt wanna wake up. darn....

ps: trying to recall something the man said to me....

Try a little tenderness- Tagged by Mesh?...

This is a shuffle game (read the rules and you'll get what i mean hehe). Be honest and just have fun, if you dont then..aww crap, the hell with it..just do it if you wanna do it hehe..

RULES:
1. Put Your iTunes, Windows Media Player,MP3 player, your playlist, ETC on Shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4. Put any comments in brackets after the song name.
5. Put this on your journal.
6. You may continue on tagging others if you wish, and if you don't..you will not commit any sin or crime..so, be happy..This is just a game..

Question 1
If someone says: “Is this okay?”
You say: 'Why - Nicole Nordeman'
(not exactly, i would normally be a bloke and ask 'what is?' although 'why' do comes out once in a while :))

Question 2..
How would you describe yourself?
'Welcome to the Black Parade - My Chemical Romance'
(a sarcastic lonely bastard with little disregard to sensitivity towards others..i think hehehe)

Question 3
What do you like in a girl/guy?
'This Love- Maroon 5'
(eyes and intelligence hahaha)

Question 4
How do you feel today?
Wake Me Up When September Ends - Green Day'
(still lost, confused and a lingering anger...)

Question 5
What's your life's purpose?
'I Don't Wanna Know - Mario Winans'
(if i knew, i might probably be doing something else now..:))

Question 6
What do your friends think about you?
'Story of a Lonely Guy - Blink 182'
(honestly i dont know...cos i couldn't give a damn, hey i dont rely on them for emotional or financial support. i'm just there cos, hmm...honestly i dont know why i even bother to have friends in the first place hahaha...)

Question 7
What do you think about your parents?
'Sunrise - Norah Jones'
(love them, though they do drive me nuts all the time hahaha)

Question 8
What do you think about very often?
'Si Gadis Ayu - Black Dog Bone'
(my predicaments...and nowadays, future events..)

Question 9
What do you think about your best friend?
'Sedang Ingin Bercinta - Dewa'
(you mean friends..well, one is dead..which reminds me, it's his birthday yesterday and the other one is getting married end of this month..)

Question 10
What song would you want them to play at your funeral?
'Fuck It - Eamon'
(yeah...fuck it, i dont give a damn. i'm dead, why should i care!! hehehe)

Question 11
What's your biggest fear?
'Rock You Like a Hurricane - Scorpions'
(i have fears, but i dont know if i have any biggest fears cos so far i've managed to overcome most of em' ..:))

Question 12
What would you post this entry as?
'Try a Little Tenderness - Michael Buble'
(hmm....Tagged by Mesh?)

man..i dont normally tag other people and i would love to stop it right here and now, but where's the fun in that right? hehehe. so, my tag victims this time would be:

1. Mel
2. Yo
3. Kupi (siou kupi, kana double tag hehehe)
4. Mamai
5. SmallVille

sorry peeps..hehe

Mel's Monday Tag

man...been tagged again, thanks Mel (that's sarcasm if you cant tell hehehe :)). but in the spirit of bloggers, i'll answer them and this time..i'll tag someone else in return hehe.

**RULES***
“The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.Each player answers the questions about themselves.At the end of the post, the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they’ve been tagged.Let the person who tagged you know when you’ve posted your answer.”
***End***

Question 1:
What were you doing 5 years ago?
In 2003, I was still a a student enjoying the campus life without nothing much to worry about..and was still baby faced then hahaha

Question 2:
What were the 5 things on your to do list today?
1. Lunch
2. paperworks
3. follow ups
4. strangle few people from the recreations department
5. take a dump muahahaha

Question 3:
What are the 5 snacks that you enjoy?
man...this is tough...i dont really go for junk foods..hmm..
1. cheese
2. cheese
3. chocolates
4. cheese
5. anything with cheese!!! hahaha

Question 4:
What are 5 things that you would do if you were a billionaire?
1. Pay off all of my family's debts and mine (boring stuff out of the way first...)---> this is a must...
2. buy my dream home..not gonna tell where hehe
3. definitely travel a lot
4. Open an animal shelter.----> i'll go with you on this Mel
5. open up a book shop or a library hehe..

Question 5: What are 5 jobs you've had?
1. land surveyor (the kuli2 punya hehehe)
2. door-to-door/ premise to premise salesman (you know, the kind which which goes shops to shops asking people to buy their stuff hehe. still remember that pitch 'selamat pagi/petang, saya dari bla bla bla dan hari ini kami ada promosi untuk bla bla bla haha. damn embarassing, but did it anyways cos i was in need of confidence build up...and it worked muahahaha!! a total 180 change after that :))
3. Marketing Executive - doing credit card sales and promotion and advertising
4. store assistant - my part time job while i was in Kuching studying :)
5. Currently in the Marketing Communications line

hmm...now who should i tag?? okie...
the chosen ones:
1. Gurangak
2. Ned (anak jagung)
3. Kupi
4. Wel
5. Mesh

YOU PEOPLE ARE TAGGED!! :)
ciao peeps...

Friday Hangout wit the guys :)

didn't exactly have a good weekend... hung out with the guys on friday night, overslept for work the next day and had to call in sick..which i took the opportunity to sleep the whole day and was supposed to join another group for a drinking session on Saturday night but had to turn it down as i was still too hungover from the previous session and went to the office awhile ago just to pass the time. sounds boring doesnt it? well...that's my life, not much excitement but i get through it.

even when i was happily laughing during friday's drinking session, i cant help but feel like there's something missing amidst the laughters..good thing there were booze to drown it all down making all the unbearable senseless thoughts more tolerable..

anyhow, here is a vid of the night's session...:)

Disclaimer: There may be some profanities or obscenities involved in the making of this video. if you're by any chance Sabahan or a person with trained comprehension of the used loghat and dialect and easily offended, please refrain from watching the video...:)



it was good someone took a video of this session cos i dont remember much of it except for the noise and laughters haha..aaa, good times. But it wont be the same if the two noisiest people weren't there, Sam and Dan :). well, pardon the language...we were just a bunch of good ol' drunk guys playing a silly game (more like games haha)

ps: come to think of it, only these people call me by my other name...cool :)

goodnite peeps...

pics source: photobucket

anger...

sometimes when confusion kicks in and you dont really know what to do, what's left is the anger..the unquenchable anger of not knowing what the hell is going on and how to deal with it. and this anger, the fire within, is the only thing which gives us that inner strength to cope with everything around us...

and at times, the anger changes its form to hatred..although only temporarily, but whois to say it wont be permanent? probably not now, not tomorrow...someday.

ps: geez...damn pissed off right now, wish i can turn back time and undo everything...

mood: duhh, am pissed off so bug off idiots....man..feels like my brain is on fire...


hey...waddya know, it's my 100th entry...a good time to be pissed off at...f*** it, i dont give damn anymore...

ps: hmmm...probably i am suffering from mild depression hehe (waddya know, a sarcastic smile there...damn it..)

goodnite...and ciao peeps...

babble and ramble...

okay..here i am in the office on a sunday. was extremely bored at home so instead of lazying around doing nothing, i decided to come in and do some menial outstanding tasks and paperworks since i'll be off tomorrow hehe..

well..finished doing my paperworks in just a short time and i decided to do some filing and clearing up and realized that i havent been diligently doing my filing for the past 2 years. no wonder my place was a mess before hehe. anyhow, things are a bit organized now and i'm pretty sure i'll be able to do my work better (fingers crossed :P)..

so, you might be wondering why i took my day off tomorrow..well, no special reason. i was told to plan my leave (i hate planning my leaves, it's not like i have much to do when i'm on leave...) and coincidently our rowing team will be going to Sandakan for a competition and they invited me to tag along (what can i say, i boost their mood with my sarcastic remarks and my angelic yet devilishly sly smile hahaha).

so okay, i applied for leave as we were supposed to leave on friday and be back on monday but after giving it a long hard thought, i decided to not join the team cos come on..what am i supposed to do when they're out there competing! cheer them with pom-poms? hahaha. i cancelled the trip and now i'm left with my remaining leave :).

was thinking of going for another round of movie marathon but there aren't any good movies playing which i havent seen yet..i could play with my dog but just the thought of playing chase with him tires me hehe so here i am, stuck in the office contradicting the fact that i'm one hardworking bloke when the fact is i was just damn bored and lazy to be hanging out at home hehe.

man...am hungry, gonna log out soon and head out to KFC, been craving for it for quite sometime (nah, not really..been dining there several times last week hehe). so ciao..

hope you guys had a good weekend..

Unbelievable- Craig David

you ever been in that situation where you've made up your mind to do what needs to be done and when that time finally came you just can't bring yourself to do it cos it feels so wrong? yeah, that's what i'm feeling now...was thinking of having a new take at life, a resolution if you may say so once midnight strikes. but as time closes in, i just can't shake the feeling that i will be doing another one of those biggest blunder in my life if i were to execute my plan...which means, my plan has to wait...probably the time hasnt come yet...(if ever..), or probably i'm just to weak to do it..whichever just doesnt matter anymore...

okay anyhow...was looking for a song to add to my playlist, unfortunately there isn't any (did find the youtube version though hehe. love the lyrics of the song tsk tsk, damn meaningful..) but instead i found another nice song to listen to with the same title (totally different song hehe). have a listen...

Unbelievable - Craig David

Always said I would know where to find love,
Always thought I'd be ready and strong enough,
But some times I just felt I could give up.
But you came and you changed my whole world now,
I'm somewhere I've never been before.
Now I see, what love means.

Always said I would know where to find love,
Always thought I'd be ready and strong enough,
But some times I just felt I could give up.
But you came and you changed my whole world now,
I'm somewhere I've never been before.
Now I see, what love means.

In my heart, in my head, it's so clear now,
Hold my hand you've got nothing to fear now,
I was lost and you've rescued me some how-.
I'm alive, I'm in love you complete me,
And I've never been here before.
Now I see, what love means.

[Chorus]

When I think of what I have, and this chance I nearly lost,
I cant help but break down, and cry.
Oh yeah, break down and cry.

[Chorus]

Now I see, what love means

hahaha, didn't mean to be sappy and all...but i just cant help to share the songs which reflects my own experiences :)...

enjoy peeps! :)

tags 2...(damn it wel :))

so okay...was tagged by Wel, not once but twice in a day..come on lah, get a life lah dude hehehe!! i guess he didn't get the part where i said i dont do tags in my previous entries hehehe. anyhow, in the spirit of bloggers..i'll try to entertain the request :).

would've done both tags but guess what..for the first tag, i just realized that i dont really have any favourite photos of my own cos i dont have much pictures to share (i'm camera shy okie..most of the time hehe) so i'm gonna KIV that first and do the second tag :P (siou noh Wel :)).

okay, the rule of this tag is to answer each question with only one word...here goes:

These are the questions...

1. Where is your cellphone? - here..
2. Your significant other? - around..
3. Your hair? - Black
4. Your Mother? - Inanam (origin ba ni kan)---> sa rasalah wel
5. Your Father? - Ranau (origin ba ni kan)--> sa rasalah wel
6. Your favourite thing? - books
7. Your dream last night? - guns
8. Your favourite drink? - chinese tea
9. Your dream goal? - wealthy
10. The room you're in? - office..
11. Your hobby? - reading
12. Your fear? - some
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? - wherever (I want to be everywhere my heart brings me...)--> sa stuju ni wel..
14. What you're not? - loved hehe
15. Muffins? - ermm...
16. One of your wish list items? - money hehe
17. Where you grew up? - Inanam, KK
18. The last thing you did? - Work
19. What are you wearing? - Clothes
20. Favourite gadget? - anything
21. Your pets? - dog
22. Your computer? - laptop
23. Your mood? - missing..
24. Missing someone? - all the time
25. Your car? - kancil :)
26. Something you're not wearing? - underwear hehe
27. Favourite store? - None
28. Like Someone? - nope (but love..yes hehe)
29. Your favourite colour? - Brown (i think, or blue, black and white hehe)
30. When is the last time you laugh? - sincerely?
31. Last time you cried? - recently..

this is what i normally do at the end of each tags...it stops here on my side hehe..nah, menyesal kan urang tag sa hehehe..

have a good weekend peeps...

Here In My Home - Malaysian Artistes For Unity

woke up, took a shower and after getting ready for work, i decided to login and do some blog browsing when i came across this song in Gurangak's blog. yeah, i've heard this song few times before but never bothered to find out who the singers were until today and it surprised me to to know our Malaysian artistes came out with the song themselves..how cool is that :).

there's nothing much to say bout the lyrics though, personally..it was a bit bland, but well compensated by the music and vocal synchronization :).



Here In My Home

Hold on, brother hold on
The road is long, we're on stony ground
But I'm strong, and you ain't heavy
Oh there's a misspoken truth that lies
Colors don't bind, oh no
What do they know? They speak falsely

Here in my home
I'll tell you what it's all about
There's just one hope here in my heart
One love undivided
That's what it's all about
Please won't you fall in one by one by one with me?
(Fall in~ Fall in~)
Fall in with me
(hmm... fall in~)
Fall in fall in fall in with me

Push back sister won't you push back?
Love won't wait, just keep pushing on
Yeah I'm strong, you ain't heavy
Oh don't you worry about that...
What we have shadows can't deny
Don't you know it's now or never?

Here in my home
I'll tell you what it's all about
There's just one hope, here in my heart
One love undivided
That's what it's all about
Please won't you fall in one by one?

(Malay)
Bertubi asakan berkurun lamanya
Hati ke depan mencari yang sayang
[Years of fears and years of tribulation
The heart keeps searching for that endless devotion]

(chinese)
KuK'¶�wpìãhýº�ã*e1¡ "p
Shou qian shou da jia yi qi zou, wo men dai biao guo ren kai kou wei lai jiu mei you diu zou
-[meaning: Hand in hand we'll march like blood brothers
I speak for my people, hope we'll find peace forever]

(tamil)
‡¨Í¤ ª¯£®Í ª¯£®Í... Ž©Í µÆ±Í±¿ ¤¾•®Í,
…¨Í¤ •©¾ •¾²®Í... ¨®Í µÆ±Í±¿ °¾•®Í,
¨£Íª¾... ¨£Íª¾...
Inthe payanam payanamm yen vettri thaagam
Anthee kaana kaalam naam vetri raagam... nanba nanba
-[meaning: May the road ahead quench my thirst for success
May the road behind echo a song of the blessed]

(Bahasa English)
Yes I feel it in my bones, so I will let it be known
No matter where I roam this is home sweet home

Sing!

Here in my home
I'll tell you what it's all about
There's just one hope here in my heart
One love undivided
That's what it's all about
Please won't you fall in one by one by one with me?
(yeah~ Yeah~)

Here in my home
(Here in my home)
I'll tell you what it's all about
(I'll tell you...)
There's just one hope here in my heart
(one hope! one hope yo! )
One love undivided
(aa~ one~)
That's what it's all about
(That's what it's all about~)
Please won't you fall in one by one by one with me?

Here in my home
(Here in my home~)
I'll tell you what it's all about
There's just one hope here in my heart
(one love one love one love ^^)
One love undivided
That's what it's all about
Please won't you fall in one by one by one with me?

well...good morning peeps!! :)

ps: am off to work...geez...

movie night - planned!! hehe

went through the movie listings for all cinemas and found out that Hellboy 2 (deemed to be the best movie of the year)and Journey To The Centre Of The Earth will be showing tomorrow..woo hoo..can't wait for it :), which means i'll be watching movies back to back again tomorrow hehehe...sweet :)

enjoy the trailers peeps :)...

Hellboy 2: The Golden Army


Journey To The Centre of the Earth


it's raining and need to tend to my hungover...gonna retire to bed early tonight, so goodnight peeps :)

hellos and goodbyes...:)

we, the human beings has evolved in countless aspects throughout the millenia. but one major thing which has made all these changes possible is the evolution of our mind or brain. the thought processess and brain capacity to receive input has dramatically changed which has eventually led us to where we are now.

but even with evolution, there are many things in this world that is still difficult to do no matter how intelligent we are, including the supposed simple things, and one of it is..saying goodbye. if we look back, analyse and reflect on the relationships between humans, we might find that there are only two powerful words in this world which are able to change the course of things, words which can make us or...break us.

it's not an exaggeration to say that the word 'love' can invoke several kind of emotions such as disgust, pain, security, wonder, happiness, etc etc...and it's not surprising the word itself can bring out the dormant self within us. when 2 persons are in love, the only thing they ever want to hear are the three words, words which should be considered a taboo until the certainty of what they truly feel is confirmed and until the gravity of their situation for being together is assessed.

in a weird and mystical way, being in love can be one of the best reason to look forward to tomorrow and being in love can change a person either for the better or worse. it's still a mystery as to how it works and why it does the things it does, but it has been proven based on many experiences by different individuals from different backgrounds

but love itself is a confusing concept, not to mention misleading as well... the fine line between love, infatuation and lust is so transparent that most would be deceived by it. even with the different definitions for each of it, the feelings induced are very similar which makes the differentiation can be somewhat confusing. so how does one tell if what they're feeling falls into which category?

there's no exact explanation for that, you know you're in love when you've found that one special person who lights up your days just by looking at them, that one person whom you couldn't afford to lose no matter what the situation is, that one person...who has ever touched you deeply, that's when you know you're in love.

now comes the goodbyes...another powerful word which could leave you dazed, confused and most of all..the feeling of losing and being lost. goodbyes has always been the end to everything, an act of letting go, and it's expecially tough to do it when either one is not ready to. just thinking of not seeing that smile, that look in their eyes which tells them you are the one and the glint which says and shows the depth of what they truly feel can be painful. but sometimes letting go could be the best thing for everyone in certain circumstances.

man...i'm hungry and sleepy (i need something heavy!!)..would love to blabber more on this entry but, my mind is getting tired the more i think of it hehehe.

ps: hey, dont take my words for granted, just blabbing stuff i'm not even familiar with...:)

morning peeps...

Adele- Chasing Pavements

posted this song in my previous wordpress blog...and decided to post it up again as i still find this as one of the decade's beautiful love song...:). do listen to it in my playlist and enjoy...

I've made up my mind,
Don't need to think it over,
If I'm wrong I am right,
Don't need to look no further,
This ain't lust,
I know this is love but,

If I tell the world,
I'll never say enough,
Cause it was not said to you,
And thats exactly what I need to do,
If i'm in love with you,

Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?
Even If I knew my place should I leave it there?
Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?

I'd build myself up,
And fly around in circles,

Wait then as my heart drops,
And my back begins to tingle
Finally could this be it

Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?
Even If I knew my place should I leave it there?
Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere

Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?
Even If I knew my place should I leave it there?
Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere

another thing which makes this a great song is the lyrics..:P

ps: deii, jiwang gila hahahaha. ooohh and i got my spot for the Sabahan Bloggers Gathering this coming August woo hoo!! :)

goodnight and enjoy peeps :)

groggy ramblings....

man...i havent slept since my last post this morning, had too many things in mind which needs major considerations.

as i lay awake in bed trying to force myself to sleep, irrelevant thoughts and trivial matters seem to pop up and clutter up my already cluttered mind with more junks. so i decided to continue doing my paperworks (yeah, actually brought my work home just in case i might get bored hehe) right up until 5am when i finally felt sleepy. but the moment i plopped onto bed, my mind started reeling with junks again and i was left tossing and turning...geez...

was actually waiting for 1 particular message last night, and i was quite sure i was supposed to have at least a news at 10.40pm cos i couldn't shake that feeling of being missed (waaa, i'm finally psychic eh hahahaha), but alas..it was just high hopes and false alarm :P. no..the fact that i didn't hear anything didn't keep me awake hehe.

man...i am SO groggy right now and it feels like i'm floating on air (no..i didn't take drugs either hahaha), it's just a matter of time until my hyperactivity kicks in (yeah, i get a bit hyperactive when i'm terribly sleepy...).

morning peeps...

blanks and thoughts...

Can't sleep and i have no one to blame but myself. practically slept the whole day through as i didn't know what else to do, besides..the drinking session i had the night before contributed to my sleeping in and the main reason why i can't sleep!!

the past 3 days, i've been drinking like nobody's business...i dunno why, probably my mood swing has returned or maybe i really do am experiencing some kind of depression (need to get myself checked out hehe)...or maybe i'm just using alcohol as an excuse to drown the things i'm trying hard to forget..who knows right :).

my first day drinking saw me alone at a bar with no one to hang out with (something which i prefer...), hung out with a colleague (at a bar as well hehe) on the second day where we had a nice chat about life, love and relationships, something we haven't been doing for quite sometime and the third day saw me drinking with a bunch of friends and colleagues laughing and cheering without having to think about the stuff which has been bothering me. in an ignorant way, it's good, so no complaints there...

but the 3 day sessions has shown me something about my drinking habit. previously, i drank to have a good time with friends, to loosen up or relax. but nowadays, it seems that i rely on drinking to forget about stuff, a temporary escape of the nagging at the back of my head trying to find the solutions to everything. well...the operative word here is 'temporary'..

yeah..drinking does serve it's purpose of relieving all your problems, but be reminded that, it doesn't solve it. what needs to be done is to face the problem head on and face the consequence. for most, being 'that ignorant' may be their answer, and for some they would need to live with the ignorance...sometimes it would work out and sometimes not.

i consider myself an ignorant person, but that's only because i don't really care much about anything. so when someone says they're ignorant, i would say they're because they dont really care..simple as that..

sometime around last week, i did something which i wasn't proud of, it was an act of desperation brought by the fact of being alone. it wasn't anything bad, but it definitely didn't feel right, not to say misleading. was i sorry? come to think of it...not really. it was an experience, a one to many kind of experience. will i be doing it again? yes, but for good reasons this time :). was it a mistake? i dunno...

that's one thing about mistakes. some mistakes happen for a reason, some mistakes feels so right and some mistakes may well be the answer to our questions. which brings me to a thought, if a mistake is wrong but yet it awards a meaningful experience for the future..how can it be wrong in the first place?

we are meant to make mistakes, and it is taken for granted. when anything doesn't work out, we call it a mistake. when something doesn't go according to what we want, we call it a mistake. if we are to blame everything to mistakes, then we might as well start considering ourselves as a mistake since we're the ones who are doing it.

i dont think i ever blamed 'mistakes' for anything which doesn't go right in my life..as much as i wanna think of myself as a pessimist, i am probably innately an optimist or a realist. i dont see things as mistakes, but instead i look at it as something which are bound to happen no matter how hard we try to avoid it. but when a person commits the same mistake over and over again, it would only mean 2 things; it's either they are not ready to accept the repeated mistake as a sign to something which is meant to be or that person is just plain stupid. just remember, it becomes a mistake when we don't learn from it...

man, am babbling again. probably i should avoid drinking for the time being until my mind clears up hehehe.

ps: done my shares of 'mistakes' in the past, but these mistakes has brought me to the answer i've been searching for...the biggest mistake of my life!! but yet, am quite glad that it happened and someday..in the future if i had a chance at it again i would do it :).

goodnight peeps...

a little something...geez...

just got in for work...decided to take a half day leave (morning) as i was still hungover from last night's solo rendezvous.

anyhow, not really in the mood for work..i would've applied for a full day's leave if it weren't for the piled up paperworks and tasks i haven't completed yet. hey, am not really complaining..i kinda like what i'm doing but there are just some days when you wish you could just stay home and do the things you wanna do without anyone nagging or anything to pull you back :). yeah, i'm having one of those days right now...

as i am doing this entry, my departmental director, who is right across me thinks that i'm hard at work doing my follow ups and the things she asked me to do when in fact i'm busy updating my blog hehe. just thinking about the workloads can be so demotivating, hey..at least am not wasting time chatting on YM or msn :).

with the clutters on both my working stations...i can't seem to concentrate well with my own work. i know i should clear it all up before leaving the office, but with everything that's been going on lately, i just dont have the time to do so (yeah, i know..excuses excuses hehehe). anyway, lemme share with you how my current workspace looks like hehe..




area overview





work stations





my comfort foods (that explains the weight gain..sheesshh...). yeah, those are ferrero roches hehe

ciao peeps :)

lessons in movies..

it's 1.46am, and i just got back from drinking at a pub alone and somewhat drunk...so pardon if i sounded a bit incoherent hehehe..nonetheless, i will tell you what i've been doing the whole day...well, the best of i know how (am somewhat intoxicated okay!! hehe)

i finally had a chance to watch Kung Fu Panda, and i expected something better for a cartoon :). hey, i'm a cartoon and anime fan, so do ignore me when i say.., kung fu panda isnt as exciting as everyone says. the humors were good, but still...it was just a cartoon. even nemo and happy feet are many times better than this! hehe. the only thing i learned from the movie was, to believe in ourselves cos we alone can make the change (yeah..tell me what i dunno :)). at least the other movie compensated the lack of excitement :p.

didn't expect Hancock to be a love story..and when i watched the trailer, i couldn't really tell what it was about. i expected something which came out from marvel comics and boy, was i wrong :).

it wasn't exactly a love story per se, there were other elements in it such as will power, trust, belief and bonding. the few things i learned from the movie was:

1. everyone needs at least one person to believe in them, to be there for them, not only during the good times but also their darkest hour.
2. friends are people who would be there for you and show you the right way. tell you that you stink when others say you doesn't :).
3. we control our own fate, etc..etc :)

but i liked the part when Charlize Theron explained who and what they were they were. she said that they were made in pairs and no matter how far apart they are, the other half would always be nearby. they're invisible when they are apart, but when they're together..their power would gradually weaken and become mortal.

in literal sense, there is some truth to it. when you've finally found that one person who is meant for you, no matter how far you go or no matter how many years have passed, the other half is bound to find you again, the attraction would never fade. and love makes a person vulnerable, a feeling so weak that you would be lost and confused at what to do, the only thing that would make sense in the confusion is your better half.

anyhow, went for a drink right after the movie. went to hunters and listen to the in house band serenade the patrons with renditions of jazz, slow rock, ballads and reggae. it was a good change from the usual karaokeing, at least there were less people and those who came seemed decent so my lone session didn't feel a bit awkward :).

had about 5 cans of stout before heading home and frankly speaking..i didnt think 5 cans would get me this drunk hehehe..

crap...what the hell am i babbling here again now hehe...goodnite peeps...

need a break? grab a shithead hahaha

1Borneo wasn't how i expected it to be, probably the fact that it's not fully operational yet played a role in my perception or the maybe i'm just not a fan of big malls :). personally i think, the place is a bit dull and there isn't any interesting places to go or things to do (except for the cinema :)).

yup, went to the cinema again last night..was just too curious to see how the place and crowd looks like and frankly, aside from it's spacious seating and everything new, it's more or less the same as the other cinemas around :). but one thing i loved about the place was, it lacks people woo hoo hehehe (good for me but bad for business hehehe).

Right after work i drove straight to GSC1Borneo to catch up with the 6.30pm show, the Incredible Hulk. since i arrived quite early, and after getting the tickets for the 6.30pm and 9.20pm show, i decided to take a long walk at the mall (hey, i had 45minutes to waste!! hehe) and do some window shopping. okay, the mall was huge...very huge and it was quite scary to think of the number of crowds when this place is fully operational...just thinking about it gives me the shivers hehehe.

okay..now back to the movies. After watching the first episode of Incredible Hulk, i decided to keep an open mind and be neutral to their latest edition. in more ways than one, the cinematography this time is somewhat different than the previous Hulk movie but more better :). i kinda liked the beginning right to the middle part as it got a bit boring...but the excitement excalated as it neared the end with the fight between the two monsters, oh..and Johnny Stark appeared as a cameo at the end as well :).

well, out of 5 stars i would probably accord the movie 3 stars only cos it was predictable, a typical comic adaptation movie, hey..at least the special effects were good and compared to the last Hulk movie, the movie this time resembles more in the comics, and that's the important thing :).

my next movie was Get Smart..well, i didn't really read through the review before watching the movie cos i wanted to watch Doomsday, so i had no idea what the movie was about (dont ask me why i suddenly decided to change my mind hehe). so when the movie played and the intro started playing, a sense of familiarity hit me, the tranporting public phone, the air lock doors and lastly the number names.

all throughout the movie i tried recalling where have i seen this kinda show but only after Maxwell Smart spoke through his phone shoes i realized this was another adaptation of a 70's or 80's popular tv show (i think most 80's babies would've seen it sometime in their life hehe) but i still couldnt recall the title hehehe. i kinda remember the original hero of the show, a poker face dude with a nasal speech (is there such a thing? hehe). oh and they had Masi Oka (the guy who played Hiro in the tv series Hero hehe), but he only played a small role in the movie..sad hehehe.

it was good, but wasn't exactly great, it was funny but not too hilarious and i would give them 3.5 stars :). my main focus wasn't on the movie though, one thing attracted me to it was because of Anne Hathaway. She's a bomb :). she's got that look of classic elegance and sophisticated beauty, ohh..and she has nice abs and legs too and other stuff hehehe. i think i've watched each and every one of the movies she has acted in and it's abvious she is set to be among the biggest stars in hollywood (well, she is now isn't she?).

by the time i got home, it was already 11.30am. and as i lay on bed, i reflected on my alone time at the mall (yeah..i was alone hehe). i realised that...it's not so bad being a lonely bastard after all...:).

ps: Will be watching 'Hancock' tonight either at 7.15pm or 9.30pm...only at GSC1Borneo hehehe

okaerinasai Jerry-kun :)

Luther Vandross - I'd Rather

previously i posted something about this song in 'after hours ramblings'. so to save you guys the time of searching the lyrics in the net, you can get it from here :)..hmm, maybe i should open up another page specifically for song lyrics eh :).
________________________________________________________

Luther Vandross - Id Rather

I thought sometime alone
was what we really needed
you said this time would hurt more than it helps
but I couldn't see that I thought it was the end
of a beautiful story
and so I left the one I loved at home to be alone(alone)
and I tried to find out
if this one thing is true
that I'm nothing without you
I know better now
and I've had a change of heart

I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
whoo-oo-oo-oo yeah

And then I met someone
and thought she could replace you
we got a long just fine
we wasted time because she was not you
we had a lot of fun
though we knew we were faking
love was not impressed with our connection they were all lies, all lies
so I'm here cause I found this one thing is true
that I'm nothing without you I know better now
and I've had a change of heart

I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
who holds my heart
I can't blame you if you turn away from me, like I've done you,
I can only prove the things I say with time,
please be mine,

I'd rather have bad times with (please be mine) you,than good times with someone else (I know)I'd rather be beside you in a storm (anytime),than safe and warm by myself (so sure baby) I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart I'd rather have the one who holds my heart (my heart)

I'd rather have bad times with you (surely), than good times with someone else (surely)I'd rather be beside you in a storm (oh yeah),than safe and warm by myself (all by myself)I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart (you know it) I'd rather have the one who holds my heart

I'd rather have the one who holds my heartI'd rather have the one who holds my heartwhoooo... who holds my heart

________________________________________________________

great lyrics isn't it...enjoy peeps and do appreciate the meaning :).

on another note, might be going for another round of movie night later but this time i might do it back to back. gonna watch 'Incredible Hulk' and 'Doomsday' right after work woo hoo, and tomorrow will definitely watch 'Hancock' :P..

ciao..

movie night...unplanned

treated myself to the cinema awhile ago and after a long time of not being at a movie, alone..it felt somewhat awkward. but after weighing my own situation, i figured that i should be getting used to it again.

a year ago, i was an avid movie goer..a lone ranger with no one to go with unless i asked anyone for company, but even so, i still much prefer going to the cinema alone. most of the time, i would get glances from the strangers around me for being alone, but i couldn't care less about what they think, they're free to judge and come up with their own made up assumptions :).

didn't really plan to be at the cinema, but since i was driving aimlessly in town, the thought of a movie night sounded like a good idea..so off i went to Cathay cineplex without any second thoughts.

the movie i watched was definitely worth it, everything was in order and i loved every bit of it. the awkwardness of being alone was replaced by excitement and there were scenes where i laughed out loud as if i was the only person in the cinema hall hehehe.

although the movie night wasn't planned, but i did go through the current and coming up movies available in all the cinemas in KK earlier at work. when i read the review on 'Wanted', it didn't really strike me as a must see kinda movie..well, come to think of it..none of the other movie reviews did hehehe. but after the last minute decision and arriving at the cinema 15mins late, that was the only movie i was able to catch :).

it was a good movie, but personally i think that Angelina Jolie and Morgan Freeman shouldn't even be casted in the movie. they're just too big for their small roles and it was a bore watching them act on roles they've done before :). but anyhow, thumbs up to the main character...he was definitely the right person for the role and someone whom we can really relate to in the movie :). am not gonna go further into the movie or else it might dampen your interest hehe. my conclusion: it's a good movie and definitely worth watching, and i did came out of the cinema wanting to be an assasin :).

a bit tired and sleepy, so am gonna retire to bed now :p..

mood: should be impromptu more often from now on. can't wait for 'Hancock' to come out, maybe i should watch it at 1Borneo this time :)

The love story...

An incredible love story has come out of China recently and managed to touch the world.
It is a story of a man and an older woman who ran off to live and love each other in peace for over half a century.

The 70-year-old Chinese man who hand-carved over 6,000 stairs up a mountain for his 80-year-old wife has passed away in the cave which has been the couple's home for the last 50 years.

Over 50 years ago, Liu Guojiang a 19 year-old boy, fell in love with a 29 year-old widowed mother named Xu Chaoqin..

In a twist worthy of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, friends and relatives criticized the relationship because of the age difference and the fact that Xu already had children.

At that time, it was unacceptable and immoral for a young man to love an older woman.. To avoid the market gossip and the scorn of their communities, the couple decided to elope and lived in a cave in Jiangjin County in Southern ChongQing Municipality.

In the beginning, life was harsh as hey had nothing, no electricity or even food. They had to eat grass and roots they found in the mountain, and Liu made a kerosene lamp that they used to light up their lives.

Xu felt that she had tied Liu down and repeatedly asked him, 'Are you regretful? Liu always replied, 'As long as we are industrious, life will improve.'

In the second year of living in the mountain, Liu began and continued for over 50 years, to hand-carve the steps so that his wife could get down the mountain easily.

Half a century later in 2001, a group of adventurers were exploring the forest and were surprised to find the elderly couple and the over 6,000 hand-carved steps. Liu MingSheng, one of their seven children said, 'My parents loved each other so much, they have lived in seclusion for over 50 years and never been apart a single day. He hand carved more than 6,000 steps over the years for my mother's convenience, although she doesn't go down the mountain that much.'

The couple had lived in peace for over 50 years until last week. Liu, now 72 years, returned from his daily farm work and collapsed. Xu sat and prayed with her husband as he passed away in her arms. So in love with Xu, was Liu, that no one was able to release the grip he had on his wife's hand even after he had passed away.

'You promised me you'll take care of me, you'll always be with me until the day I died, now you left before me, how am I going to live without you?'

Xu spent days softly repeating this sentence and touching her husband's black coffin with tears rolling down her cheeks.

In 2006, their story became one of the top 10 love stories from China , collected by the Chinese Women Weekly. The local government has decided to preserve the love ladder and the place they lived as a museum, so this love story can live forever.

________________________________________________________

am not quite sure the extent of how true this story is, but just thinking about the man's sacrifices and the notion of true love actually does exist somewhat gives us hope to believe that there's actually one person out there who is meant for everybody, the one person who completes each other :).

anyway, everybody believes love is unconditional..but the plain fact is that, love is downright conditional due to the selfishness it possess. so, if you really do love that certain someone, make an effort to show them what you truly feel in both actions and words and never leave them wondering. the longer they wonder, the more insecure they will become and eventually lead to a break up. remember, there's no point in crying over spilled milk..if you can't afford to do all these simple tasks than never ever regret your loss...

ciao peeps...

mood: feeling a bit sentimental and realizing that my chances are getting slimmer by the minute and eventually lose that one thing precious :p...