promises...

yeah, i've made a promise (or promises to be exact)..and i intend on keeping it true. it may be my pride and ego talking, but hey...a promise is a promise, and it should be seen through until the end..it may be a loss to either parties, but there may also be that silver lining which might bring hope to someone else's gain :)....

a not so pathetic entry...

i grew up practically alone, being the odd one and only son in the family has led me to experience life's journey with less help from anyone...basically, my experiences are based on my own trials and errors and in time, i learned to experience life from others' point of view..and thankfully, my observation skills towards people has greatly improved over the years (or probably reading people is a skill which runs in my family...).

the reason for this entry is because, in just 2 months time few of my ex's has either gotten married or engaged and honestly speaking..i am happy for them, and i am quite happy and relieved on my end..

looking back on my relationships with them, all i can say is...we had a good time. we clicked on every level and can even talk about practically everything, and i could've been their perfect boyfriend if it wasn't for my own insecurity. the insecurity didn't stem from jealousy, but instead..from my own twisted perception on the relationships. then again, back then..i didn't know what love was..and i dont think i know what love is now, well..for quite sometime, i thought i've found love but apparently the notion itself remains vague up until this very minute. but i do care for them deeply though..

as i was saying, i was feeling insecure. i couldn't shake the feeling that they're better off with someone else better than i am, and being able to see beyond the present situation..i began to distance myself and eventually broke it off with them. yeah, i may sound like having a commitment issue..but i don't..not really i think..it's just that, knowing what'll happen next overwhelms the what could've beens.

but do i regret it? no, but i do feel guilty of not being able to explain the entire truth to them, i just couldn't tell it straight to their face that 'i've seen your future, you would someday end up with someone else better than i am'..i mean, who would believe such a thing? hehe.

that was why i beat myself up badly on my recent breakup, for once i wanted to prove myself wrong cos i thought, maybe..just maybe, if i had put in enough effort things might turn out differently..haha, yeah silly isn't it..in the end, it happened just as i've foreseen it.

haha, i'm not saying that i have the sixth sense thingy, but there are just some things, after taking into account an individual's personality and the current situation, the truth or the so-called future can be revealed :).

to the ladies who was for a brief moment a part of my life, thank you for being there. all i can say is that, you're now with someone with calibre and more successful than i could ever be and i'm happy for you ladies :). guess wat...this song is for you...

TO ALL THE GIRLS I'VE LOVED BEFORE - Julio Iglesias & Willie Nelson

To all the girls I've loved before
Who travelled in and out my door

I'm glad they came along

I dedicate this song

To all the girls I've loved before.

To all the girls I once caressed

And may I say I've held the best

For helping me to grow

I owe a lot I know

To all the girls I've loved before

The winds of change are always blowing

And every time I try to stay

The winds of change continue blowing

And they just carry me away.

To all the girls who shared my life,

Who now are someone else's wives

I'm glad they came along

I dedicate this song

To all the girls I've loved before.

The winds of change are always blowing

And every time I try to stay

The winds of change continue blowing

And they just carry me away.

To all the girls we've loved before

Who travelled in and out our door

We're glad they came along

We dedicate this song

To all the girls we've loved before.

To all the girls we've loved before

Who travelled in and out our door

We're glad they came along We dedicate this song

To all the girls we've loved before.

ps: hmm...just replace the 'love' to 'care' okay..i never said i love you girls throughout our relationship did i? yeah..and you girls had to get hitched within a few weeks from each other eh. was that some kind of subtle payback? hehehe. dont worry bout me, i've stopped searching and now just doing what special single guys does..having practices and fun until the person comes along..if ever...:)

the fat bastard...

what was i doing? posting a sappy entry haha. had to remove it from this blog and save it somewhere else. promised you peeps that i won't be posting anything pathetic anymore didn't i? hehehe.

anyhow, just so you know..the mind over matter thingy worked and guess what, am now in total pink of health, didn't even get the fever hehehe. then again, probably the exercise from the jogs and playing ultimate frisbee helped :).

yeah, you heard me right...am now trying to get back in shape, hopefully better than i was 3 years ago. and so far, i've lost about 2kgs in just a week's time (hey, i once lost 10kgs in 3 weeks time okay, so don't be surprised..apparently i can easily lose weight as long as i exercise hehe. but losing the 10kgs required daily exercise such as jogging everyday for more than 30mins hehe). but this time, am just gonna lower it down to 78kg, i think that should be my ideal weight (am 83 kg now :P) and if i were to speed up the pace..i need to start doing the daily exercise :).

the only thing i really need to lose is my beer belly...yeah, i have a beer belly!! hahaha. but i just can't be bothered to do the situps :P. so for starters, am gonna cut down on my drinking spree for a couple of months and see how it goes. one thing about having a beer belly is that...you can actually feel the fats wobbling around everytime you run, and it's damn uncomfortable, it actually interferes with the body balancing (well, that's my opinion :)). even when i lost the 10kgs, i didn't see any difference on my tummy..darn it...gotta start doing those damn situps again...

anyhow:

this was me approximately 3-4 years ago: The skinny me (70kg)...
picture taken: after few rounds of rough housing and hardcore sparring with a room mate hehe
mode of exercise: full court basketball game from 4pm until 8pm *or volleyball from 5pm to 7pm *or badminton from 6pm to 9pm and silat/taekwondo on alternate days from 7pm to 9pm..(* indicates whichever starts first)
diet: rice and mostly vegetables and once in a blue moon meat..

this was me approximately 2-3 years ago: still acceptable (75kg)...
picture taken: after cleaning up the room :)
mode of exercise: basketball 3 on 3 (or sometimes full court), volleyball, badminton and martial arts but only according to mood swings or availability.
diet: rice, mostly vegetables and eggs (occasional meat)

this is me as of few months ago!!: the big bellied fat assed bugger muahahahha.
picture taken: the second jump from the jetty
mode of exercise: constant boozing!!
diet: booze and anything goes (hey, i may be fat but still as agile :P) hehe

ps: i wonder...a change in 3 months? hmmm....we'll see about that :p...but i think i injured my foot (i think the bone on the side of the talus) from jumping around trying to catch the frisbee...damn it..hehe

g'nite peeps hehehe...

Whoring with Chores - tagged by Wel

Wel, if you think this tag is amusing, that only means one thing....YOU HAVE TOO MUCH FREE TIME IN YOUR HANDS!! hahaha.

here goes :)

RULES:

1. List down the household chores you HATE and WHY. Do you think you can survive without helpers and nannies?

2. Copy the image above

3. Tag as many you want - wifes, hubbies, mommies, daddies and even grannies can also join..

4. Add your blog's link in the domesticated divas linky love.

5.) Leave a comment at Stripe and Yellow to be added into the master list as seen below...

DOMESTICATED DIVAS: Living the Healthy Life / Stripe&Yellow / Vanity Kit / Mind Bubbles / Something Purple / Em's Detour / Me,Myself+2 / Kidd Designs / FunFierceFabulous / Ozzy's Mom / Insights from the Grocery Cart / Living A' La Mode / God's Best Gift / MommyAllehs Up-Close And Personal / My Precious Niche / Just Me.. Eds / Eds Mommy Life / Aggie Shoots Aggie Scraps / All Kinds of Me Stuff / The Salad Caper / Winding Creek Circle / InkBabyStudios / Joys in Life / Me and Mine / Little Peanut / Creative in Me/ Pea in a Pod / Sugarmagnolias / Notable Bistro / Around the World / I am Mommy / All About The Memories / Enchanted Play / In Depth / A Housewife's Journal / Life Together Starts / As We Face Forever / My Happy Place /Iam Dzoi / Suburban Sass / To the Moon and Back / Raising Sandy / Walk on Red / All Things Me / Because Life Is Fun / Feels Like Home / Growing up with Bea / My life... my own piece of heaven / Around the World / Hobbies and Such / My life in this Wonderful World /My Online World / / My Virtual Closet / My Views On My So Called Life / The Real Deal The Real Me / Changing Lanes/ Pit Stop/ Around the World / The Fountain Of Happiness / The Joy Of Life Forever / Love Is / Phtographic Memories / My Colorful World / Strawberry Gurl / Quicker8 / Mommy's Little Corner / The Dawn That Shines / Journey to Prosperity / Homelife / Sheng's Simple Thoughts / Coriander Dreams / Gorgeous Traveller / A Traveller's Domain / Lemon Iced Tea / It's My Party / My Wonderful Life / Simple Life, Simply Me / Sassy Finds / All things Yummy / Shangrila Journey / My Charmed Life / Mommyhood and Me / Crissy's Zone / Crissy's Library / Vis Vires /Crissy's Haven / My Daily Thoughts / Abby's Way of Life / Princess Bela / Women Xplore / Our Journey to Life / My Planet Purple / And so I am / Arlene's Random Ramblings / Life's All About / Lourdes' Mia / Faery Dancing / Me, the islands and the world / Pinay heart wanderings and musings / Juls Random Thots / In The Spirit of Dance / Princess Vien / Quicker8 / Anything and Everything in Between / Designs By Vhiel / Vhiel's Corner / Can of Thoughts / A Mother's Stuff / housewifeatwork / Kuting’s Place / My Daily Thoughts / Pinay heart wanderings and musings / Watchamacallit! / Nellypie's Chatterbox/ Purpled Sky / Almanac Queen / Caramel Corn / Sunny Side Up Foodie / Mamakshop / Alamakoioi / JoZe's Crap / My Sweet Escape / Our Little Princess Gwen / Writing 50% in jest / Designated Hermitage / JerryInc

hmm...chores that i hate huh..lemme see...

chore: washing the dishes
why?: cos i'm a lazy bastard...duh...

chore: ironing
why?: i'm just plain lazy!!

chore: sweeping
why?: too much work..

chore: washing the car
why?: just lazy and too much work...

hmmm...i'm actually quite a neat and tidy person, even if my place is in a mess, i would rather clean it up myself than having someone to do it for me (at least i would know where the stuff are kept hehe).

so that's all i think. now, the tagging:
1. Mel
2. Yo
3. Kupi

it doesn't really matter if you peeps wanna do it or not....i don't mind not knowing hahaha..

ciao hehehe..

ps: bah Wel..suda terjawab aa hehehe

Pictures from Saturday night at Rumba - Flip Flop Party 2

Tongue in action huahuahua

the happy couple :)

another tounge in action

Thelca, Tess, Suz @ Ching ching, Pam

Steve & Suz

Stacey & Lee Rod (band drummer)

Tess, Suz & Steve

Ollie, Mark, Kit and Judith

Thelca & I

Dennis and I

Ollie, Mark & Suchen

ermm...that's all peeps.

wake up ignorant bumiputeras...

Paper: New Sabah Times

Date: Saturday, August 16 2008.

Page: 4

Title: 2,000 UiTM Sabah students stage peaceful march.

yeah, the headline says it all. how shallow and ignorant can our own bumiputera be? apparently, the students are in protest with the recent Selangor Menteri Besar proposal to allocate a 10% quota for non-bumiputera students into the reknowned Uni.

well, this is the fourth procession after Shah Alam, Kelantan and Perak, and what pissess me off is that our own Sabahans students are doing it!! hey come on, just because their Student's Representative Council President were coaxed by his peers from the other branch to do the rally doesn't mean the rest of the students has to follow. in a way, this is quite a shameful act from a distinguished local Uni..and in first glance, it would look like racism.

According to the president, "this gathering of the students signifies our spirit to safeguard the rights of the Bumiputera nationwide in regard to pursuing studies in UiTM", he added, "UiTM is the only public University left that gives special attention and care to the Bumiputeras. It is unbecoming for one to change the comfortable position that we are enjoying now as bumiputera students". ---->> geez, total bullcrap dude. just shut your pie hole if you're doing this at the request of your peers or superiors, do you really think that your so called special attention and care will be taken away for a bunch of minorities? and for those cows who got herded by the president...WAKE UP!! besides, because of the so called special attention and care, most of the students take granted for what they have.

to all the Sabahan students who participated in the march and to the head of council, this is what i have to say:

'open up your eyes kids. do you really believe that by agreeing to the 10% quota would change the integrity and foundation of your so called distinguished Uni? do you really think that the non-bumiputeras around are rich bastards who could afford to go wherever they want to? or are you afraid of losing to them in your own home ground?

if the government can be lenient in their quota for non-bumiputera to work with them, please do tell me why can't an arrogant institution do the same thing?'

i just can't believe that our own Sabahan students are willing to herded around and take part in this seemingly racist act...i believe all of us were raised to give everyone regardless of their background an equal chance at everything. did you participate in the march because you really believed that non-bumiputeras shouldn't be allowed in your institution or it was the chance to be in the papers eluded your conscience?... typical cows who would let a blind farmer lead them everywhere.

pardon my sudden morning outburst. it's just so annoying reading stuff like this. dont they know some change might be good for them? there's no doubt the institution is one of the best (or may well be the best..only among the local Uni. had a chance at inter varsity debate tournament and i've seen what they're capable of. guess what, i've seen better), but they're still far from advanced in their mindset if they can't even accept changes. there are certain things that should be limited to bumiputeras only, but when it comes to areas such as education and healthcare, everyone should be granted the equal opportunity.

ps: hmm....i couldn't find any article which states "UiTM is ONLY reserved for bumiputeras" although i did find out that in history, it was previously opened for the POOR and MARGINALIZED Malay race to keep up with their tertiery education. hmm...gets me thinking then, probably those well off so called bumiputeras shouldn't even be considered into the Uni.

then again, if they wanna live in their own arrogant and ignorant little world..then so be it, these times are changing. we need a mindset on par with international standard, not a mindset of a 40yrs old status quo. a change is needed if we are to improve ourselves...idiots...

now..this is the rambling of an ex-vice president of a student body council (who won the most votes but didn't become president because of religion..) donkey years ago. wasn't really favored by the president, management and student affairs cos i was constantly in disagreement with them (hey, there are things that needs to be considered before making a decision and i wasn't afraid to say my mind...heck, i got more respect from my peers than the president himself. probably that's why stupid leaders piss me off hahaha) and sided more to my fellow students (another reason for participating in the election, aside from the glory and how good it would look in my resume, to make a change for the better with due considerations).

morning peeps!!

the mantra...

body aches all over from the ultimate frisbee game yesterday..not to mention the fever which is gradually catching up....

i'm not going to be sick, i'm not going to be sick, i'm not going to be sick, i'm not going to be sick...

ps: i am getting sick....damn it...2 more days, i just need couple more days and i'll be better...

i'm all good hehehe

my five nights of continuous booze binging has finally taken it's toll physically...i've mentioned in my previous post that i've been fighting the onsets of getting the fever and i thought if i get drunk and ignore it, my body would heal naturally. yeah, i know it doesn't make sense, just wanna see for myself the effectiveness of the so called placebo effect hehehe. the conclusion: since i haven't gotten the fever, i must say it is quite effective..but it all depends on how strong your mind is in tricking your own body hahaha.

for the past five nights, i dare say i've been enjoying myself. the drinking sessions has helped alot in dealing with the demons within (yeah, i drink, get tipsy or drunk, go home and head straight to bed hehehe). before you peeps start jumping to conclusion, lemme assure you that i have yet to be an alcoholic..i drink to divert all those unwanted thoughts away, i know it doesn't solve the problem..but it sure is a temporary relief to the tired mind :), but last night was definitely the cherry on the topping...i went bar hopping and i had a blast!!

i started out at @Bar alone (yeah...what's new? hehehe), and after having a chat with a prominent stranger (that's one thing great about @Bar, the patrons are civilized people and not rowdy as in most bars, having a chat over the bar with anyone including strangers doesn't feel awkward at all), i decided to join my cousins and friends over in Blue Note at Shangri-La's Tanjung Aru Resort. the last time i was in this place was more than 6 months ago, and although i've heard they made some changes to the place..i never expected it would be way better than before!! hehe. We didn't stay long though and adjourned to Rumba in Le Meridien.

I didn't plan on going there, okay maybe i did hehe, i was supposed to meet up a fellow PR worker there but decided to cancel at the last minute..well, if i knew i was going there anyway i wouldn't have made that call. Good thing i had the decency to call and inform her of my sudden change of plan hahaha.

i had a blast there, not because of the crowd but because i was happily snapping pictures with my friend's new Canon D60...it was a lot better than mingling around hahaha. we stayed there much longer than we did at Blue Note, and since it was nearly closing time...the group decided to head to Razz Ma Taz as their final destination which i only joined for less than 30 mins cos i was quite drunk by then and the place reeks of smoke hahaha.

why the hell am i telling you peeps of my booze escapades?!! geez hahaha. anyhow, what i really wanna share with you is what i did today :). i'm not sure if i've mentioned this in my previous blog..but i've gained weight! i've been trying to look for a sport which i can play and doesn't bore me, i refuse to do jogging cos it's boring..i dont have a badminton or tennis buddy (not that i'm any good at it hehe) and golf is too expensive! haha...so when a couple of friend suggested i should join them for a game of ultimate frisbee, i thought to myself "what the heck, might as well go for it", besides, i needed to get rid of the hangover.

okay, i thought this game was your typical throw and fetch kinda game and boy...i couldn't be more wrong! it takes stamina and agility to play it!! haha. the last time i had this much workout was few months back during my weight losing stint (which i did manage to lose 9 kgs in three weeks hehe).

i think i was a natural in the game (what can i say, i have this natural ability with any sports related with the using of the hands hehe, but i wish i had the same sportsman stamina 3 years ago before i got lazy and fat huhuhuhu). lemme put it in layman term, the game requires ALOT of running around hehehe.

i would love to explain more on this game, but i think you peeps should try it out yourself. For more details on the game schedule, please go to Sabahbah.com, this group is looking for more people to join in and make it a challenging game :). Don't be shy to join, they're really fun and friendly people to be with! Hey, i had fun and made new friends..this may be the game i might be very good at (aside from basketball and martial arts hehehe).

ps: gonna start doing my endurance training for improved stamina and to get rid of this beer belly. it's time for me to regain my slim lean physique 3 years ago hahaha, and i'm getting a new phone soon, which means no more spending money on booze until end of this month huhuhu. then again, if i am serious in losing weight and getting rid of the belly, i need to quit drinking for the next few months...damn it..but i think i can manage :p.

Just got back from watching 'Mirror' with Mel and Yo, good stuff peeps..you might wanna check that out :).

goodnite peeps :)

Saturday Humor

Saturday humor for the weekend hehe...ciao and enjoy :)

tipsy rambling

just got back from my solitary session..and i've finally found the place where i can be alone, a place where nobody would come up to me and be friendly hahaha.

nearly made another mistake today, decided to be friends with my ex but decided otherwise cos..come on peeps, how do you expect to be 'just friends' with someone you ever cared about, someone who doesn't give a shit bout' what you feel? good thing rationality kicked in just in time or else i would be torturing myself over the same mistake again hahaha.

anyhow, been fighting the onsets of getting the fever for the past couple of days...it wasn't easy, but good thing there were alcohols around hehehe. right now my right foot and left knee hurts, and my phlegm has traces of blood in it hehe. but i dont really mind, cos i know i would get this way with the sudden change of weather hahaha.

honestly, i hate being on the downside...i hate feeling miserable with my own life and i hate feeling weak. then again, these are just some of the things i should be experiencing after having been protected by the defensive wall built throughout the years.

ps: like i said, a bit tipsy hehehe. i've finally found a new port for my solo drinking session :). life's good :P....

good nite peeps...

reality bites...

i was kinda in a crappy mood yesterday..so instead of going straight to work, i stopped by at Gaya Street for a bowl of Ngau Chap..yeah, stayed there until 12pm doing nothing but restaurant hopping hahaha (yeah, had Nagau chap for breakfast and went to peppermint for their chicken rice as lunch hehe). but the morning wasn't in vain, i managed to check on my parking outstandings in conjunction with the 'bulan pengampunan DBKK' hahaha.

anyhow, soon as i got in the office..the blues suddenly came down on me like a boulder or anvil dropped from a cliff. i was pissed off at everything and i can't wait to get out from the office.

that's what i did...the moment i was free after 5.00pm, i got into my car and started driving without exactly knowing where to go, i didn't wanna go home..i just wanna be somewhere else where no one knows me...somewhere unfamiliar.

i had Hunters in mind..but, like i said...i wanted to be somewhere new and unfamiliar when i passed by @Bar...and that's where i went.

so there i was sitting alone at the bar having a nice chat with the bartender about stout when suddenly a couple appeared. i was very much surprised seeing them there cos i was just thinking about calling them up and invite them over to the hotel for my monthly media entertainment. the encounter last night saved me the time and effort of coaxing them over hehehe (Julia and Jaco, if you're reading this..remember, you're booked for next month hehe).

right after @Bar, i headed straight to 'The Loft' at Waterfront and met up with the gidiots hahaha (ladies, i think we're spending to much time with the threesome hahaha) and had another session of endless laughters.

what i'm trying to say is, i like where i am now..no more confusion, no more trying to figure out where i stand. but that doesn't change the fact that i am desperately missing someone hehehe, from now onwards, am just gonna let rationality take control..no more thinking from the heart and just let the mind steer the vessel :).

ps: ladies, if you're free..lets hang out at @Bar or Cock & Bull Tg. Aru. would love to see what other facilities they have and :)

morning cheers...

Talk about being cute hahaha. thanks Yo :)



morning peeps, enjoy the vid hehe

LOL!!!!

last night was great...it wasn't crazy great but it was great nonetheless. haven't been laughing my ass out for a very long time, with the gidiots around..there wasn't a single moment of boredom (that's a compliment okay ms. gimitator and ms. gexpressionist huahuahua).

i work in a field where socializing plays an integral part of the job, but looking back, i haven't been doing that for quite some time to the point of being labeled as anti-social. in a way i am...i mean, people just can't be trusted. i've seen and experienced the ugly side of everyone around me leading to the twisted perceptions of people in general hehe.

okay, i may look snobbish or anti-social to some, but looks can be deceiving...living life mostly in solitude has not dampen my ability to socialize. i can be a social butterfly if i want to..operative word here is: if i want to. but i'm just not one of those guys who goes around trying to make friends with everybody like it's some kind of popularity contest...geez, we're not in high school anymore and i've learned to live independently without needing anyone to rely onto (recent relationship has proven that without any doubt, damn it hehehe). i dont need a big circle of friends to have fun, i just need intelligent and non-shallow minded people to have a good time (idiots are just too difficult to handle hahaha).

anyway...i still find it funny everytime i think about ms. gimitator's personal teaching experiences..'lelest' and 'especially.....a BED!!' HAHAHAHAHAHA...well, 'os cof' all of you dont know what i'm talking about, you weren't there :P. probably some of you need more than '2 minutes' to digest what the hell i'm rambling about..and if you still don't get it, stop trying and just get a 'screw driver', probably that will help hahahaha.

last night was great gals...we just need to add more gidiots in the group to prove that ms. gimitator is actually a gidiot magnet hahaha.

ps: still can't stop laughing here....we should do this again. now these are the true beauties with brains hehehe.

entertainment...

Will be having the two 'gidiots' who thinks 'gero' starts with 'g' over at the hotel for dinner... if you guys dare to back off at the last minute, am really gonna make your life miserable okie muahahaha.

on a lighter note...

Dear Yolanda and Melissa,

I am looking forward to meeting you gals tonight for a night of stupid sarcasm (and remarks) and cold idiotic laughters. As you know, i am one fragile human being who couldn't afford any rejections, especially last minute change of plans...not to mention a stressed out hardworking lad who would do anything beyond the norm if the supposed plan for tonight were to suddenly change (if you know what i mean).

So for our sakes (i'm just not ready to be in jail for what i might do), do honor our threesome date (well, foursome if we count the photographer, which i assume you have forced him into submission to be your designated driver).

Yours sincerely,

The gidiot who knows Gero is not spelled with a 'G', but most probably with a 'Y' :).

ps: cynically laughing at self for own craftiness...hehehehe (do it with a little bit of cheekiness when reading the laughter sound)

Got this from Yo & Mel

Good one and exactly what i'm doing now...

read more in PostSecret

Jason Mraz - I'm yours

my feel good song for this week :)

Song lyrics | I'm Yours lyrics

morning peeps and happy monday!! hehe

Touching strips...

Big Sis emailed me these strips...thanks Gems...

Hello. This is Coco Wang.

As you know the breaking news of 5.12 Earthquake in China, almost all the TV channels in China are broadcasting 24 hours non-stop of every development and stories of all the rescue operations in all damaged locations.

I don't know how much information the BBC or any UK media received from us, I imagine the UK audiences were presented with the major developments of the incident, but you are probably unaware of many important and inside details which are only known to people inside China.

The amount of incredibly moving stories of victims, rescuers, and volunteers is simply shocking at the moment. I have been collecting newspapers of all the stories, and telling them in the form of comic strips. I hope these stories could show the UKreaders the love, warmth and courage of the Chinese people, also the sad and cruel reality of the horrible 5.12 Earthquake.

I am back home in Beijing now. Thousands of heart-breaking stories are happening 24 hours non-stop everyday, some are so sad that you can hardly bear, some are incredibly moving that you just can't stop crying... I wanted to go to the front to help with all those people, some of my friends have already gone there, but I heard that the traffic needed to be kept totally clear for rescue transportation at the moment, people like me without knowledge of first-aid and experience of rescue operations going there now would cause choas and trouble... but I can't just sit at home and do nothing, I have been crying my eyes out in the past three days, I have never felt more proud of my country and people... their love, courage and kindness rock me to my core! I have decided to tell these touching stories by drawing comics. I am going to send you comic strips almost everyday from now on, I hope you could know something about the earthquake in China, although you don't have to do anything, but I hope you could feel our love and hope.

Thank you all so much.

Coco Wang

reflect on it peeps..hope you enjoyed the strips...

ciao..goodnite & signing off :)

ps: Humans can be total jackassess most of the time, but it's undeniable that in the face of dire consequences, their God given hidden capabilities emerges as testament to our strengths and courage proving that we humans can go beyond the limit of human endurance.

another nonsensical entry...

as of my last post, one thing i learned from last night's experience is that when trying to overcome or get over something, all you need to do is to indulge yourself in something greater or better which overwhelms the existing experience....period hahaha.

anyhow...what did i do today?...hmmm...woke up quite early with a bad hangover..went for breakfast...check my emails...played with my dogs (all 8 of them)..went out to look at big sis's new apartment wit mom...went for lunch wit mom...surfed the net...had a long chat with my big bro (glad he's doing great nowadays) went to a friend's place to send some stuff...and right now might be going to my cousin's place for some kind of birthday celebration :).

i was beaming the whole day..and for once, i didn't get pissed at anything. i even had a long chat with my mom bout stuff which i don't normally talk about..it felt good, really good. i'm not much on good terms with my parents, don't get me wrong..they're great, it's just that my ego and bad temper is always in the way for improvement (yeah, my bad....).

i grew up telling myself that, i'll always be rebellious until they learn to understand the person i really am, but i was wrong. i now realize that...it is I who should try to understand them, i should work around what they want..not what i want and it is I who should be holding the white flag and not them...after all, they're the ones who brought me into this world.

honestly...i'm not sure why i'm writing this entry hahaha. probably the Little Man has given me a little something from his recent sabbatical hahaha. i just feel extremely happy :).

ps: punya main jiwang...mcm sya punya masa mau sampai suda oo kan hehehe...cool :).

drunken rambling hehehe

did an experiment today...just wanted to prove my theory that getting over someone is alot easier when you have someone with you...theory proven...and i had fun. getting over is a synch now...:).

ps: dead drunk, had a good time (extremely good). i'm still certain that sex without any feelings sucks...then again quite fun. no strings attached. i'm single and have no obligations hehehe. everything's good :).

man, i am smart...once i'm challenged to do something, once i've proven my theory....everything are just idiotic hehehe.

goodnite....

naked revelation...

the morning didn't start out well...woke up early and tripped over my own footing when i got off from bed (clumsy? could be haha), went to the shower only to find the tank was dry (wtf!!, how am i supposed to go to work without showering?!!)...contemplated for a bit and realized..i'm working at a 5 star chain hotel in Tuaran!

went free willy in my office trousers, got into my car and dashed to the hotel. on the way, i did more contemplating...should i take my shower in the staff locker room, in the fitness centre locker room or in the golf locker room? hmm, it was simple..went straight to the golf locker as i prefer privacy during my showers, less people the better.

the showers were empty, yeah...why wouldn't it? no one plays golf in the early morning. placed my stuff in the locker and stepped inside the showers. when i got back to my locker, there were a couple of Korean dudes and an englishman..chatting and laughing away in their birthday suit. naked guys in public makes me uncomfortable, probably i'm just not used to it...even during my time when i used to go swimming at the sports complex... and it has nothing to do with feeling inferior cos i'm not hahaha.

after the free viewing of naked guys galore, the thought stuck in mind...how can a naked person stand comfortably in front of another. i do find nudity as a form of art, but only if it was meant for art..for other casual days, i find nudity a bit disturbing hahaha. i mean, being naked when you're having sex is another thing..but being naked in public? come on peeps hahaha.

so..nudity anyone? hahaha

ps: being nude is only permissible when you're having a shower and having sex muahahaha

before you guys leave, check out this entries by:

a) Amy C------------->> CLICK HERE (for sarcasm and humor hahaha)

b) Ned P ------------->> CLICK HERE (for cute and cuddly stuff hehe)

The Little Man

Little he may be, but he possesses all the worldly knowledge and seem to have the answers to almost anything. Whenever he opens his mouth, only the truth and foresight of things to come are told. Sadly enough, he's not alone up in my head, way down below lives ego and pride..the power couple who are constantly harrassing the little man's every decision.

Ego..inhibits greed, twisting truth into conceivable lies and making me believe that i am invincible when the plain fact is..i am invincible not because of my ego, but because of the truth.

Pride..seemingly harmless and says or acts so little it may well have been ignored most of the time. But that's what makes it dangerous because 'It is the calm and silent water that drowns a man' - Ghanaian Proverb.

When pride and ego combines, chaos and confusion ensues, and the little man is pushed further and further away... not forcefully but willingly and there's nothing i can do stop him from leaving because it is not my place to ask him to stay, but one thing for sure, he will reappear when he is needed the most..when i am ready to listen again, i'm ready and he's back...

we had a long chat yesterday, and he made me see my flaws..and the root of my anger. before any of this happened i was given 2 choices, to go through my decision and face the pain or save myself the pain and live life as i've always had.

i chose to do the latter, thinking it would be the best for everyone. but finally gave in after been given the crocodile tears, the sweet talks, the empty assurances and for once i thought..the little man might be mistaken this time around and i might get what i've been searching for all these while.

i was wrong..dead wrong, and pissed..damn pissed. pissed because i turned my back to what i've always believed in and pissed at trying hard to prove that the Little Man was wrong.

but the Little Man is back now. there's nothing more gratifying than being able to see the true colors in everything and the truth behind the lies once again...

About Love
'Love is like a disease. It infects you when u least expected it. it grows on you like cancer. its virus evolved and shows symptoms; jealousy, hatred, joy, and others. We let Love flow in our veins. a dangerous but a noble choice. we get hurt at an utmost situation. then love kills you even if you're glad it's there. There's no cure for love. No matter how you try to find a closure, it'll still leave its scar. you still had the pain in you and remembered the process of it's infection.

Love has an impetus effect on you. It made you do the damness things. Something you wouldn't know you were able to do. there's no definite term to elucidate Love. it's cruel. It's a force. It's somehow sweet.

When we said we don't want to fall in love again.... don't let your guards down. Love is stronger than it seems to be. It'll find its way. want to fall in love? then take care of yourself. '

Taken from: Aleaf - I'm Not a Green Bag

ps: woaaaahh...i'm a nut case hahaha :D

Morning peeps!! :)

hehe...

buenos dia pueblos :). otro nuevo dia por nuevo experiencias, excepto...el tino algo es perdida, un vano triste...de cualqier modo, no por problema. apenas quiero con boquear yo echar ese persona :).

just needed to get that off my chest :P...

ps: pardon the grammatical errors okie...still in the learning process :P..

morning peeps...

updated (12.21pm):
cual estoy diciendo?!! tienes caido pues algune otra..geez.., muy inocentada de me..lo siento..

aaahhh.....:P

man...hungover (whats new? hehe) and in no mood to work. darn it... even came in late for work today, good thing the boss isn't around for this whole week hehe..

getting drunk wasn't part of the plan when i decided to have a nite out last night..and after having 4 sets of tiger at hunters, my friend and i decided to join my cousin at Raz until the wee hours. dang...should have just went straight home that night, better yet..i shouldn't even think about having drinks on weekday!

felt a bit down and needed something to drown it off, but i should've known by now that drinking isn't the way to deal with life's intricacies. so does that make me an alcoholic? hehehe. maybe i should enrol myself in a rehab clinic :p...

anyhow...this shall be my last entry for the today..will update this blog tomorrow. ciao peeps...

subtle coincidence...

yeah...final closure, FINALLY!! been trying to get that for quite a long time now, but the answers are always unsatisfactory due to its insincere and selfish nature hahaha. see, confusions arise from dishonesty and being secretive. i just needed the truth to be liberated from all of this and now i have it, no more complaints.

had a short chat with the ex, and bade each other our final goodbyes before parting ways. coincidently, 'Happy Ending' by Mika was playing in my playlist...probably it was a sign, for the both of us :). Gosh, never felt so liberated before woo hoo...i still wish that we can stay together much more longer though..as was once promised, but then again...nearly all of the promises were broken (not by me for sure haha) so there's no point hanging onto empty words right? :).

well, partly the blame is on me...i should've been more understanding and less jealous, but i had my reasons to be so..and a very good one at it :).

okay, gonna leave you with the said song..i know i've posted it before, but for sentimental reason am gonna re-post it hehe...

Happy Ending - MIKA

This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,But not together.

Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life
Can't get no love without sacrifice
If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well
A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' every day

This is the way you left me,I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,But not together.

2 o'clock in the morning, something's on my mind
Can't get no rest; keep walkin' around
If I pretend that nothin' ever went wrong, I can get to my sleep
I can think that we just carried on

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever moreI feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' every day

This is the way you left me,I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,But not together.

A Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love[repeat]

I feel as if I'm wasted
And I waste everyday

This is the way you left me,I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,Like it's forever.
To live the rest of our life,But not together.

ps: Thanks for everything...for always aa..

what's up? :)

i need more sleep!!! that's all i wanted to say hehe. woke up quite early today (quite? that's an understatement for someone whose hobby is sleeping!!!), say at 4.45am. needed to be at the hotel by 6.00am since there's a photoshoot going on at the club. the shoot ended pretty quick though, by 8am we're already done, which is good actually..if only my office hours starts at 8.00am!!! dang...

yeah ok..so, i had about an hour to burn, but instead of going back to the office and start working 60 minutes earlier than usual, i decided to do something else..drove to Tuaran town and got my headlight and brake light fixed, yeah and fueled up. okay replacing the bulbs cost me about RM5..which is quite unexpected..but when i fueled up, i realized that a full tank for Kancil is about RM60 (and gauge meter didn't even point to the max), wtf!! it used to be around RM40 for a full tank, the RM20 makes a lot of difference. then again, was quite glad i didn't get myself a new ride cos i've been thinking about it since early this year :).

normally, i wouldn't mind having my meals alone..but today, i felt like having a company so i called up Sabas and we had breakfast at one of the Chinese shop around. then again, another reason i looked him up was because i needed to pay him the registration fee of a direct marketing thingy i enrolled as his downline hahaha. will blog more on that someday when i have fully grasped their business mechanism hehehe.

okay...a friend asked me last night what's new with me. been quite sometime since anyone asked me that question and in a way...i was flattered, my reply was 'biasa2 jak..'. can you see the egoistical answer i gave out without giving it much thought hahaha. yeah, i was proud...what i wanted to say was 'well, life sucks..but i'm coping'. but if i were to tell him that, he would start grilling me with the details (or probably annoy me with his nonchalant attitude) and i'd rather keep things to myself than get sympathised or ignored hahaha.

so what's up with me? well...'besa2 jak lah' hahaha. but i'll be moving back with my cousin in Sepanggar (confirmed) by next week, and i won't be going out as much as i have been (not that it matters anymore :p) especially on weekdays (too far from town and the fuel hike is taking its toll hehe). no more internet-ing at nights and will be spending most of my time after work probably with badminton and the playstation (yeah..and books as well :P) haha.

life is good though...it only gets worse when you expect more from it :). deal with it realistically, let it progress naturally and everything will definitely fall into place :). another lesson learned...

ps: just got my renewed road tax after it expired in March hahaha. it was delayed cos i wanted to synchronise it with the car insurance hehehe :p...fyi, am getting a bit tired going out in big groups, right now am looking forward to hanging out with only 2 or 3 pax per group..big group gives me the headache, too much effort in trying to understand what's going on in their heads :).

good morning peeps :) hehe...

flirts and boundaries...rebounds and mistakes...

one thing sucks about breaking up is seeing your ex with another person or flirting with one. well, it only hurts when your feelings are still as strong as before...

okay, now let's talk about flirting. everybody flirts, even when you're currently attached with someone and basically, flirting is quite harmless...as long as it is within boundaries. personally, there are only two reasons as to why people flirt...to be at ease with that person without any ulterior motives or to gain something in return, either a relationship or just plain sex with no strings attached.

for the lonely bastards (including myself), flirting is a process of getting into a relationship..the first step of getting to know the person we're interested with. but for most of those people out there who already has someone with them, flirting is all about getting their rocks off! damn f***ers :).

there are ways to detect if your current partner is flirting with someone else, and it varies according to how well you know them. sometimes it could be the look in their eyes, their gestures, speech and mostly...their actions. there's no point to further elaborate on this, anyone can sense it themselves and the hunches are always on the dot.

but does flirting constitute to cheating? not exactly..as long as no physical contacts (sex or tongue wriggling hehe) are involved, the cheating element does not exist. so okay, is it still advisable to flirt around when these contacts doesn't apply? my opinion, no. personally i think when someone even considers of flirting around, the chances of cheating or being cheated is there, and that's one thing i dont understand..how can a person even think of flirting around or scouting for a ONS (one night stands) when they're currently attached.

when i was in my recent relationship (which totally failed), i couldn't think of anyone else to be (or do it) with but that one person only, never once did i cross the boundary..hey, come to think of it, i didn't even flirt with anyone at all... see, i am strange, i dont think i can get it up with anyone random hahahaha. was going to talk about open relationships, but it is obvious what my stand would be right? :). my motto was, don't do what you dont want your partner to do, in that way..you have every reason to be mad when he/she does what you didn't do :).

we get to be very vulnerable after every break up, and some people would even try to take advantage of your situation. but they can't be blamed, to them..this may be the only time they can show their sincerity to form a relationship with you, which is always touching. and sometimes, we fell for it probably because of being blinded by the need to love and be loved in return. but as your heart heals, you realised a mistake has been made...yeah, you may have feelings towards your current spouse, but you also know that there's someone out there whom you're totally in love with, but there's nothing you can do..well there is, you just don't know how to go about it..you're just so indebted with what the person has done you would rather settle for what is (right now) than what could've been, and you bet on your chance thinking that what you feel for that one special person will pass like your other flings..but what if it doesn't. would you regret not acting on what should've been? (like i'm the one to talk hahaha) :).

anyhow, had my own share of experience in this (strangely enough, i got calls, text messages and approaches as if knowing i just broke up haha) ...i never felt so hurt before and all i needed was to have someone to be with me irregardless of who they are or what they look like (yeah, i was dead desperate hehehe). i knew where my desperation was leading to, and if it wasn't for that advice from my so called big bro, i would be in a rebound-relationship by now. good thing i wasn't, cos i know i would totally regret it :).

dont worry peeps, am not pissed off or melancholic, just needed to get some stuff off my chest...one piece of advice though..always trust your instincts when something doesn't smell right :).

ps: man..i dont like what i'm seeing, you're doing it again hahahaha. oohh, my right knee is bruised..have no idea how it happened. damn it :)...stop it boy, you're rambling again..dont be a gidiot for everybody's sake (err..ok kah tu Yo/Mel, gitu kah mau eja gidiot tu? hehehe)

ciao peeps :P...

outrageous?....haha

darkness...a yet to be known matter which exists in either realms...physically or spiritually. there's darkness at night, darkness in the unknown, darkness in the unfathomable and darkness within everybody, which no one are willing to accept.

you see the smiling faces, hear the laughters of everyone around and you are tempted to have and experience the same things..and you succeed, but deep down you know it will only be temporary because someday you will realize that this was not exactly what you wanted or until they found out the truth of the man behind the facade...probably they already do, it is just a matter of time...

thats one thing about humans that we have to understand, people are just not to be trusted...they may be fun to be with for a while, but after sometime..when they finally uncover the masquerade, we might wish that we have never known them in the first place..sad isn't it..bear in mind, people change..sometimes for the better, and sometimes for the worse..

mouthing off at other people is another side humans are quite skilled at...every imperfection or anything which doesn't suit or appear nice becomes their target of criticism or mockery, their justification for doing so; they think they're better than them or better yet, they were born in perfection. physically, they are...but somehow rather, they always lack that certain something which makes them..perfect. we humans are not perfect, so don't go around talking about anyone else's imperfection when we ourselves has lots to improve. do that only when you're certain you have nothing to apologize for.

what separates the people from being humans? nothing, but not everyone gets that. from the inside, we are all the same..so why does racial prejudice has to exist? why can't humans respect one another without bias and bigotry? why can't people accept everyone for who they are. we may have heard of the illegal immigrants around, and we think and speak ill of them..but doesn't anyone see, they're humans as well..

and what's this about caste, ranks, class etc etc? what makes them better than the rest of the people? just because they have more money and influence doesn't make them any less human, but if they think they're better than the rest because of that...then maybe, everyone should live in poverty...

as i was saying, there is darkness in everyone..yet at the same time, there is light as well. this is the light which guides our conscience, the very thing which brings us up whenever we are down. no matter how lost or rotten a person is, their light is still there...calling out for help, it's just that the darkness is so overwhelming the light couldn't shine through. hey, we were born with the light, that's why our innocence as babies exudes greatly. but with any light, there are bound to be shadows, creating the darkness from within, and as the years pass by...the light grows dim and darkness envelopes, but not entirely as the light struggles to flare hoping someday it will burn bright as it was before when we first came into this world.

what i'm trying to say is, there is kindness in everyone...for some, we just need to look a little bit harder to see them...people just wants to be understood, to love and be loved in return....

ps: yeah, what crap....people are just scums who doesnt know shit about anything...hahaha